Perhaps this is my penance.
You see, dear reader, up until Wednesday, I was a complete Transformers virgin.
I never played with the toys, never saw the cartoons, never read the comics, and never saw a frame of the movies (except for previews).
That's not by way of any judgement. But when Transformers came along, I was too old, and honestly, just had no real interest in them. That's no reflection on any who do like them. It's just, they missed the sweet spot for the perfect age for me to be exposed to them, and not my cup of tea.
Until yesterday. When my Locale Comics Shoppe had this freebie sitting on the counter:
Ye gods.
But, free is free, right? And who can resist a razor-based robot emblazoned with a corporate logo hanging with Optimus Prime?!?
And yes, he's a normal razor by day, and a Decepticon-fighting robot by night!
Sweet Jeebus.
Hydrobot actually gets an origin!!
A hero for our times.
And the good doctor has a question that is surely the same that all of us have:
Again, I'm a novice with this Transformers mythology. But isn't calling yourselves Decpticons akin to calling yourselves the Brotherhood Of Evil Mutants? [I'm sure there's some brilliant in-universe explanations that makes sense of this--PLEASE don't tell me!]
Anyway, this is probably why I gave up shaving decades ago...
5 comments:
Oh this isn't creepy at ALL! The razor you just used is watching you... and... judging you.
*fighting...urge...to...inform...various...origins...of...word..."Decepticon"...some of which...are stupid...and some of which...are clever-if-obvious-after-the-fact retcons...but...will...refrain*
Oh how I have longed for a tiny male-gendered robot to caress my skin while simultaneously handling my daily grooming tasks.
I can relate. I had one (obscure*) toy and I made the bad decision to watch the first Bay movie. That's about it. Watching those weird Hydrobot ads on the telly doesn't do much to draw me further into the franchise.
But if they keep raiding 80's cartoon properties to gain access to the wallets of credulous fanboys, I'll wait 'til they get around to Bravestarr.
* Who remembers headmasters? Slightly confusing to young me because that's what school principals are called, or were, here in blighty. The fact that my headmaster transformer was brown and beige added to the effect.
I want a Galaxy Rangers movie!
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