Manic Monday--JLQ

OK, I have some questions about the much delayed Justice League Of America #3 from last week.

Let's set the scene.

Since Stargirl is apparently super-popular (perfect tell, don't show, guys!), Amanda Waller has her cranking out pro-JLA PSAs:

Meanwhile, as part of a plan to infiltrate the Secret Society Of Super-Villains, Catwoman (whom the public is unaware is a member of the Justice League) is going to let herself be caught stealing some jewels...

...and let herself be publicly chased down by the JLA...

...and imprisoned...

...In Arkham?!?...

...and then escape.

So...I've got some questions.

A) They lock up jewel thieves in Arkham Asylum? Really? It must be getting pretty crowded in there if they're throwing non-violent, non-insane petty crooks in there...Does Geoff Johns understand what Arkham is...?

(I would ask about admitting Selina in full costume, but, you know...Arkham.)

B) After PSA's promoting the team as"protecting the world as no other team can," their first public mission is...chasing a cat burglar? And then heavily publicizing that the freakin' Justice League Of America is out "in full force"...to capture a non-super-powered thief? What's next, sending the team out to stop muggers? Mixed PR messages, is all I'm saying. Then again, DC is the expert in mixed PR messages...

C) Steve Trevor is all chuffed when Green Arrow shows up to interfere with their little pantomime. Although, if he didn't want interference, then perhaps staging a very public crime and chase of Batman's "friend with benefits" across the rooftops of Gotham might not have been the best strategy. Even if Batman were otherwise occupied, there are plenty of other vigilantes there who might have turned up to "help"...

D) This issue shipped 5 weeks after its initial solicitation date, which is pretty damn late for being only issue #3. Since this book is the one of the lynchpins of the Trinity War event, what are the odds they can get the book back on schedule to sync up with JL and JLD? How long until Finch is benched, or given substantial "help"?

Then again, this is DC, who published the Epilogue to the First Lantern story before the final chapter of that same story, so maybe they just don't care about releasing their crossover stories in order...

Manic Monday--Questions, I Got Questions

**So, roughly 12 seconds after being resurrected, Odin has bailed on everyone again, mostly because no one really seems what to do with him. And now "Asgardia" is ruled over by the troika of Idunn, Freyja and Gaea.

Wait, Gaea? I know she has some ties to Marvel's Asgard, what with being Thor's mother and all. But she has strong ties to other Marvel mythologies, as well--she's helping protect Earth from the Celestials, empowering Hercules during the Chaos War, defending Earth against Dormammu, cursing the Defenders, protecting Earth against Egyptian snake gods...yes, these all happened. Plus, she presumably has some ongoing duties as Earth Goddess and all. So, isn't she kinda busy to be running Asgard, too?

Yeah, yeah, I know, goddess, well-nigh infinite powers, time works differently, avatars, yada yada. Still...plus, you'd think the Asgardians might have something to say about this non-Asgardian brought in to rule over them...(of course, given the dearth of Asgardian females, they didn't have many other options than outsourcing if they wanted a troika. Valkeryie was kinda busy. Sif becoming a queen of Asgardia might have made for some interesting stories, though...)

**Remember the first story arc of the latest volume of Avengers? Where they spent 6 issues sorts kinda fighting Kang? And lots of characters and creatures were time-displaced? And they all got put back *except* Killraven? Remember how he was know stuck in present day Marvel-616?

It's almost 2 years later, and I don't think that's been so much as mentioned anywhere. Even Bendis seems to have forgotten.

So. What do you think that Killraven has been up to? Just hangin' around the ESPN Zone in New York? Got a job? Hiding during Fear Itself?

And with Killraven taken from the future, do the Martians now win? Way to go, Bendis...

**Hmmm...when Flash expends too much Speed Force energy, wormholes form and stuff gets displaced in time and space. Apparently, though, no one noticed this for the five years that Barry has been in action. And apparently it never happened during a Justice League case.

Damn, I guess Barry was just coasting all those years...

**Remember when Green Lanterns were Space Cops, dealing with Space Crime and Space Villains in their sectors?

I'll admit, I'm not reading the GL mags right now, but as far as I can tell they've spent the past 5 years or so doing nothing but fighting other colored Lantern Corps, or each other.

All I'm sayin' is, there must be a lot of happy Space Criminals out there, because the Space Cops are too busy with their color-coded silliness to stop Space Bank Robbers and Space Hitlers and stuff...

**When the FRAK is someone going to get off their butts and get all the clearances settled so the Batman '66 TV series can be released for home video?!? I swear to Odin Idunn, Freyja and Gaea that the first presidential candidate to promised me this gets my vote...

**Speaking of which, I would pay real money if it's revealed that Batman '66 is really a member of Batman Inc. That Bruce Wayne picked someone to be the Batman of Latvia or something, but, as in the Star Trek episode A Piece Of The Action, the locals get waaay to into it and decide to base their entire culture on their skewed understanding of Gotham City...Come on, Grant...

Questions That Others Dare Not Ask--Savage?

Once again, Slay Monstrobot ask the questions that no one cares about dares to ask:

Now that we have a universe where The Man Of Bronze gets to cavort around with some DC characters, shouldn't we consider the possibility that Doc Savage just might be related to this guy?

That would explain an awful lot, if you think about it...

Questions That Others Dare Not Ask--Sandwiches?

Here at Slay Monstrobot, we routinely grapple with The Questions That Others Dare Not Ask.

Specifically, this week we must ask, what is Bruce Wayne's favorite type of sandwich?

A:

Now, it should be said that Bruce Wayne was working undercover here, posing as a riveter at a shipyard. So we must consider the possibility that this was just him trying to fit in...that this is Bruce Wayne's idea of what a blue-collar guy would consider his favorite sandwich. Method lunching, as it were.

Then again, I'll bet Alfred makes some frakkin' great bologna sandwiches...

Gourmet Bruce Wayne is from World's Finest #46 (1950).

Questions That Others Dare Not Ask--The Hair!!

Once again, we must delve deeply here at Slay Monstrobot, and ask the Questions That Others Dare Not Ask!!

The question...

Why are people always ragging on Norman Osborn's hair...

...yet no one makes fun of Sandman's...

...even though he'd been rockin' the same 'do for years before Normie ever showed up?!?

Just askin'...

Pics from Amazing Spider-Man #37 (1966) by Ditko, Dork X-Men: The Beginning #3 (2009) by Jae Lee, Amazing Spider-Man #4 (1963) by Ditko, and Amazing Spider-Man #615 (2010) by Javier Pulido.

Another Question That Others Dare Not Ask

Some people ask the easy questions, about Marvel and DC mash-ups (OK, we did that here at Slay Monstrobot, too).

Some people spend their time whining about how surprisingly awful Justice League: Cry For Boredom is (hmmm, we do that here, too...damn, are we in a rut, or what?!?).

But once again, here at Slay Monstrobot, we ask the hard questions no one else dares ask.

Let's say, just for example, that you're Satan (yes, that Satan)...

...and you've just possessed a young women so you can use her body to go hunt someone down in the mortal world:

(By the way, good pick-up there, Disney--now you own Satan!!)

Anyway, in such a situation, what is the ONLY thing about your plan that could go wrong?!?

A) Satan's mini-skirt will draw unwanted attention

B) Marvel will go all cowardly cutlet during the story and suddenly change you into Mephisto or Sattanish or some other lame-ass attempt to do a Satan story without getting the blowback for doing a "real" Satan story (No, no, it's not Satan--it's Sattanish!!)

C) Because you've possessed a Native American, your plan will be defeated by rampant ethnic stereotypes

D) You might forget to disguise your voice

Let's see the answer, shall we?

Yes, that's right, the only "disastrous" outcome would result from using the "raspy tones of Satan":

Because, Satan--the Prince of Lies, the Inventor of Deceit, the Source of All Evil--apparently might forget to disguise his voice during an important charade. And some nurse might figure it out.

Editor's note: some of us though, might fight the raspy tones of Satan coming from a girl to be...well, kinda hot:



Disney's latest purchase brought to us in Ghost Rider #1 (1973), by Gary Friedrich andTom Sutton. Suzanne Pleschette, of course, brought to us by heaven...

Answering The Questions Other Dare Not Ask!!

There are certain questions about comics that others shy away from asking, perhaps because they are too deep, too dark, too frightening.

But not here at Slay Monstrobot. No, sir, we will gaze right into the abyss, and hope that it gazes back.

Tonight's question?

We know that Ant-Man--whether he's Henry Pym, Scott Lang, Eric O'Grady or Garrett Morris--had the ability to control ants via the cybernetic circuitry of his helmet.

The Question That Others Dare Not Ask is:

Could Ant-Man control this guy??

I mean, then Ant-Man really would be a force to be reckoned with.

Plus, he could have commanded the little guy to kick the Flash's ass: