Monday, October 15, 2018

Manic Monday Triple Overtime--Siri, Alexa, Google...Or Bill Buster?!?!

So, we're all living in the future now, right? Computers and phones and "smart speakers" and the internet on every damned gadget, all we need is replicators and we're living the Jean-Luc Picard lifestyle! Thanks, tech companies!!

Ah, but is any of it particularly new?

Check out the snazzy smart home put together by perpetual loser Bill Buster!

What, you can't walk up one flight of stairs, lady?

Ah, fortunately, there's no need to!

What about dinner?




Yum!


Wow!!

Sounds great!! And i don't even have to say "OK, Google" every time!

But...



D'oh!!


Too bad you can't call tech support, Bill!!

From All Great Comics (1945)

Manic Monday Bonus--She Blinded me With Golden Age SCIENCE!!!

I know that it's far too easy to pick on science in Golden Age comics. But by gum, someone has to pick the low hanging fruit, right? Especially from a Wonder Woman comic!!

Let's start with today's weather report:


SCIENCE!!

Hope you didn't have plans!

Well, it actually happens, and suddenly there's a new continent, Neptunia, just sitting there in the Pacific! And those Neptunians, they're a strange bunch.


Well, that's one way to do it.

And how, exactly, do you make a "mechano"?

This is a good argument against low-sodium diets!

SCIENCE!!

Seriously, I never learned any of this in biology!!

Anyway, it turns out that women are immune to becoming mechanos...

True dat. SCIENCE!!

And it turns out that current mechanos can be cured. Salt! Lots and lots of salt!!

"Sodium-chloriding" is a perfectly cromulent word. SCIENCE!!

Well, the Neptunians aren't going to take this lying down! They have a plan!

SCIENCE!

SCIENCE!!

SCIENCE (and property law?)!!!

Meanwhile, it turns out that Neptune is crawling with...Tigerapes:

Yes, tigerapes:

So, if you can't turn the Holliday Girls into mechanos, you can turn them into tigerapes!!

How? SCIENCE!!


No, not "double-talk," Etta--SCIENCE!!

(And yes, "deevolutionarying" is totally a word, no matter what my spell-checker says!

And one more time--


SCIENCE!!

From Wonder Woman #15 (1945)

Manic Monday--Captain Marvel Gets Cosmic (Eventually)!!

Look, I've gotta say it--the early Captain Marvel--Marvel's Captain Marvel, the Kree guy, Mar-Vell--was pretty stinky.

Especially after Roy Thomas and Gene Colan moved on. There were a succession of different writers and artists, and the book ha no real direction. Major sub-plots and villains were introduced, and then forgotten about; Mar-vell's mission on Earth never advanced one iota; we went through about 7 cycles of "Yon-Rogg accuses Mar-Vell of treason, Ronan or the Supreme Intelligence clear him, and Mar-Vell promptly goes off the reservation again 2 panels later"; characters randomly appearing on planets or galaxies where they couldn't be; Mar-Vell constantly getting new powers that the next writer would forget about or handwave away...

And, yeah, there was that terrible, terrible costume.

But eventually, gradually, fitfully, the various creative teams--almost by accident--began moving Mar-Vell to the cosmic cool guy we came to know and love (and mourn).

Starting in Captain Marvel #12 (1969), the team of Arnold Drake/Dick Ayers/Syd Shores introduced Zo, a cosmic entity who bestowed new powers upon Mar-Vell:


Yeah, that "conquering time and space" and "creating mass illusions" didn't last very long.

Two issues later, in #14, Gary Friedrich/Frank Springer/Vince Coletta brought back Zo, and amped him up--and the cosmic factor--even more:

(Letters by Artie Simek!!)


Next issue, after a trippy Marie Severin/John Verpoorten cover...

...yet another new team (Gary Friedrich/Tom Sutton/Dan Adkins) treat us to the history of Earth...

...Zo gets even freakier...


...and the Captain is straight out tripping balls...


Plus, a quick tour of heaven...

...and Hell!!

The very next issue--with the completely different team of Archie Goodwin/Don Heck/Syd Shores--decided that a whole bunch of retconning was in order. It was revealed that Zo never really existed. It was just a Wizard Of Oz man behind the curtain thing, as Ronan used a holodeck...

 ...to try and gaslight Mar-Vell into destroying the Supreme Intelligence so Ronan and cohorts could stage a coup. In fact, it turns out that everything that had happened since Mar-Vell's debut had been part of this plot!!

(But somehow Marvel kept the powers that Zo gave him--but just for 3 pages...? How...? Don't ask!!)

And thn Don Heck gives him his new costume:

Well, we weren't quite fully cosmic yet. Roy and Gil Kane took over the next issue, stripping Marvel of his Zo powers, but introducing Rick Jones and the Nega-Bands.

But after 3 issues, the books was cancelled, than revived six months later for 2 issues, then cancelled for 2 years, then Marv Wolfman & Wayne Boring (!) puttered around for a bit, and finally, Mike Friedrich and Jim Starlin came on board, and soon enough he was blond and cosmically aware and leaving sparkly trails and fighting Thanos and doing Hostess ads.

And then they killed him.