Wednesday, October 31, 2018

Dial E For Eternity--History's First Evil Twin!!

My fellow comics fans, presenting history's first evil twins:

OK, not the first evil twin story--obviously there must have been evil twin stories before this (even though I'm too lazy to look this up. You get what you pay for, folks).

No, what I'm talking about is, withing the context of the story, it's revealed that Mr. Keeper and his evil twin are over 1 million years old!! Take that, Man In The Iron Mask!!

And so our story begins--and yeah, I've already spoiled it for you--with Keeper's evil twin brother!

OK, let's grind things to a halt here.


As far as we've seen in the previous 68 Kid Eternity stories, everybody goes to Eternity. Everyone.

We've seen him summon villains. Sure, some have been fictional, so you can suggest that only "real" people go to Stygia. But we've also seen him summon real killers, actual murderers, from Eternity. And we've seen him send them back explicitly to Eternity!! In fact, just a couple of weeks ago we saw that a murderer and his victim were expected to share living space in Eternity!!

So what the hell is this Stygia?

Maybe only certain crimes--the worst of the worst--get sent to Stygia?!? It makes you wonder what Keeper's brother did?

Or perhaps Kid has been unknowingly summoning people from Stygia?!? Still, we've actually seen some of these evil-doers and killers walking amongst the clouds in Eternity!!!

Let's let Keeper fill us in on what the hell is going on.

Kid, you've hung with the guy for 4 years now!! Not even a few rudimentary personal questions until now?!?!

Hmmm...maybe Stygia is only for, um, heavenly personnel, who have gone bad? (It's not, though, as we'll see in a few stories...)

Or maybe evil people just hang in Eternity while they're waiting to be "judged?" (But we've seen Kid summon Attila and Ghengis Khan, "two of the worst villains in history," from Eternity--is the system that backlogged?!?!)

Well, maybe we'll be better able to understand Stygia in a few months, when we hit Kid Eternity #15 in a few months. Meanwhile, on with the story!!

"Handsome Harry" and his gang are knocking off a theater...


Keeper's brother decides to help them... showing us powers that Keeper himself doesn't have (or does he...?)!


Not knowing the Keeper's brother--Hey, story, how about giving the guy a name? No?? OK, I'll just call him Mr. Kreeper.

Anyway, not knowing that Kreeper is helping Handsome Harry, our heroes pursue the murderer, and discover...

So, finally, Kid figures out to summon a recently killed person to sort out what happened!

Dagger Dan!!

Ah-Ha!! "Until you are judged"!! But then again, Genghis Khan. So confusing...

If we have the exact address, do we really need to know what type of house it is?

Meanwhile, at the hideout, Kreeper makes himself known...

So you can levitate cars, but can't make yourself visible? What a crappy power set...

Still not aware of Kreeper's presence, Kid decides to burst in on the crook with the help of...

Wolf Larsen!!

And he's one hell of a fighter...until:


And now Harry comes after Kid---with his sword still bloody!!

Meanwhile, it's time for the brothers to meet up:

Kid is getting his but kicked, so he calls for help...

...but with Keeper occupied, he has no powers! do you tie up a being who can turn immaterial?

Can Kreeper pull off the impersonation?


Kid sleeps it rough...


While Kreeper gets Harry to go after the Cup Of Jove.

Kreeper goes back to posing as Keeper...but he runs into trouble trying to keep Kid from using his powers.


When it doubt, hit Kid with a big stick!

Meanwhile, at the museum...

Wait one gosh-darned second!! You're already dead, Kreeper! Are yoiu saying that it could, what, permanently end your spirit?!?

By the way, what a stupid curse--only the first person who touches it dies, and then it's open season?!?!?!?

Anyway, Keeper has freed himself, and along with Kid, it's time to take care of Kreeper!

Crazy ass story...although we did miss an opportunity to give Keeper and actual name. Also, I think I deserve a lot of bonus points for not working a "his brother's Keeper" pun in there somewhere...

This was the 69th Kid Eternity story, and our summoning roster is:

Abu 1
Achilles 4
Adam 1
Antony, Marc 2
Apollo 1
Aramis 2
Arnold, Benedict 1
Arthur, King 2
Astor, John Jacob 1
Athos 2
Atlas 3
Attila The Hun 1
Attucks, Crispin 1
Baker, Lafayette 1
Barry's father 1
Barton, Clara 1
Bernhardt, Sarah 1
Bertillon, Alphonse 2
Blackhawk 1
Bloodhounds (Legree's) 1
Bluebeard 1
Bolivar, Simon 1
Boone, Daniel 1
Bowie, Jim 1
Boyd, Belle 1
Brady, Diamond Jim 1
Breitbart, Zishe 1
British Tank crew 1
Bucephalus 2
Bunyan, Paul 3
Byron, George Gordon 2
Caesar, Octavian 1
Cagliostro, Alessandro 1
Calhoun, John C. 1
Canary, Martha “Calamity” 1
Cannon, John W. 1
Capulet, Juliet 1
Carden, Foster 1
Carpenter, Daniel 1
Cave Man 1
Cherry Sisters 1
Christian, Fletcher 1
Clancy, Patrick 1
Cleopatra 1
Cody, “Buffalo” Bill 2
Colt, Samuel 1
Columbus, Christopher 2
Corbett, Jim 3
Corcoran, Peter 1
Crockett, Davy 1
Cronson, Gerald 1
Crusoe, Robinson 1
Custer, George Armstrong 1
D'artagnan 2
d'Aubigny. Julie 1
Daedalus 1
Dagger Dan 1
Davis, Richard Harding 1
de Bergerac, Cyrano 2
de Leon, Ponce 1
de Rais, Gilles 1
Decatur, Stephen 1
Discus Thrower 1
Dockstader, Lew 1
Dracula 1
Drake, Sir Francis 1
Dupin, C. Auguste 1
Edison, Thomas 1
Emery 1
Ericson, Leif 2
Fagin 1
Fairbanks, Douglas Sr. 1
Faraday, Michael 1
Fink, Mike 1
Frankenstein's Monster 1
Franklin, Ben 1
Galahad 1
Geronimo 2
Goliath 1
Gotch, Frank 1
Gothicus, Claudius 1
Grant, Ulysses S. 1
Graymalkin 1
Greb, Harry 1
Griffiths, Albert 1
Gulliver, Lemuel 1
Hamilton, Alexander 1
Hatfield, John 1
Hathorne, John 1
Hauser, Kaspar 1
Henry, Patrick 1
Hercules 2
Hermann, Alexander 1
Hickathrift, Tom 1
Hickok, Wild Bill 1
Hippocrates 1
Hodges, Joe 1
Holmes, Sherlock 4
Hopkins, Matthew 1
Horatius Cocles 1
Houdini, Harry 3
Houston, Sam 1
Hyde, Edward 1
Hyer, Tom 1
Ikhnaton 1
Ismail, Yusuf 1
Jackson, Andrew 1
James, Jesse 1
Javert 2
Jeffries, Jim 1
Johnson, Martin 1
Jones, John Paul 1
Jove 2
Kamehameha 1
Khan, Genghis 2
Kidd, William 1
Lafayette, General 1
Lancelot 1
Larsen, Wolf 1
Laughing Cavalier 1
Laveran, Charles 1
Leander 3
Lee, Robert E. 1
Legree, Simon 1
Leonidas 2
Light Brigade 1
Lincoln, Abraham 1
Lister, Joseph 2
Marable, Fate 1
Marshall, John 1
Masterson, Bat 1
Mercury 5
Merlin 1
Mesmer, Franz 1
Milo Of Croton 2
Minutemen 1
Mix, Tom 1
Montague, Romeo 1
Montezuma 1
Morgan, Henry 1
Mounties 1
Mulgrew, Jason 1
Murphy, Charles 1
Napoleon 1
Nation, Carrie 1
Neanderthal 2
Nefertiti 1
Neptune 1
Nightingale, Florence 1
Noah 1
Nobel, Alfred 1
Nobody 2
North Wind 1
Nostradamus 2
O'Brien, David 1
Oakley, Annie 1
Og 1
Orpheus 1
Osceola 1
Paddock, Charley 1
Pasteur, Louis 1
Penelope 1
Perseus 1
Pheidippides 2
Pied Piper 1
Pinkerton, Allan 1
Plastic Man 1
Pocahontas 1
Porthos 3
Post, Wiley 1
Prometheus 1
Quixote, Don 1
Revere, Paul 1
Richard the LionHeart 1
Rin-Tin-Tin 2
Robespierre, Maximilien 1
Robin Hood 3
Roc 1
Rogers' Rangers 2
Röntgen, Wilhelm 1
Russell, Lillian 1
Rustum 1
Ryan, Paddy 1
Samson 3
Sandow, Eugen 1
Sayers, Tom 1
Schleyer, Johann 1
Serra, Junipero 1
Siegfried 1
Silver, Long John 2
Skunk, Jimmy 1
Socrates 1
Solomon 1
Stanley, Henry 1
Steinmetz, Charles 2
Stogie 1
Sullivan, John L. 2
Tecumseh 1
Tell, William 1
Thalfi 1
Thor 3
Thumb, Tom 1
Thurston, Howard 1
Tiglath IV 1
Tuck, Friar 1
Tut-ankh-amen 1
Twain, Mark 1
Ulysses 1
Uncas 1
Valjean, Jean 1
Vercingetorix 1
Villa, Pancho 1
Villon, Francois 1
von Helmholtz, Hermann 1
Vulcan 1
Washington, George 3
Watson, John H 1
Webster, Daniel 2
Whittington, Richard 1
Xanthippe 1
Zbyzko, Stanislaus 1

NEXT--Ghost town!!

From Kid Eternity #11 (1948)

Tuesday, October 30, 2018

Your Tax Dollars At Work--You're A Drogo, Cobber!

Look, you can't expect to send our troops to serve in a foreign country without a guide, right?

But you civilians had best not be looking at this!

Damn straight!!

This was produced during WWII, and the library stamp is from May 1943, so there's your timeline.

First, you have to reassure the poor Americans stationed there that there is an important reason to be in Australia!

Then, lots of illustrated features to teach them local facts!

Then, the most important feature--what do Australians eat?!?

Clearly, Australians were an alien species. Look at that butter consumption!!

And then there is their freaky money!

Less freaky nowadays, thank goodness. 12 pennies to a shilling? 20 shillings to a pound? 21 shillings to a guinea? Who has time for all that math?!?!

And then there's the way they talk! The War Department felt obligated to publish this handy translation guide for U.S. soldiers!