Friday, December 14, 2018

Dial E For Eternity--A Day At The Races!!

It's love and horses for Kid Eternity this time out!!

Kid has fallen hard for a woman's voice...

And the lass and her family are facing a crisis:

You know, if your whole mortgage comes down to a horse winning a race, you might need some help with your financial planning.

And apparently, the Civil War is still being fought in the steeplechase world!

"Yankee interloper!"

Well, Kid is smitten, so he's going to help!


But their only horse broke his leg...how can you help, Kid?

Bayard!! Of course, both Bayard and his owner Lieutenant Renaud were fictional, and Bayard had magical powers...but there's probably no rule against entering a fictional magical horse in a high-stakes race, right?

And just a reminder--the fact that Kid Eternity can summon animals is going to play a big role in my Kid Eternity And The Legion Of Super-Heroes series...

Kid may be in love, but Mr. Keeper is a huge wet blanket!

OK, OK, can of worms time. We've never established exactly how old Kid is--12? 13? Older? Still, since he doesn't seem to age anymore, and someone who is currently 18 is "too old" for him,...does that mean Kid can never have love? He's doomed to never have a relationship?!? That's one huge drawback to this deal Eternity gave you, Kid!!

Still, despite Keeper's remonstrations, Kid is happy...

And let it never be said that, when love is involved, the Kid can be pretty damned smooth:


Frederic Chopin!! And Nicolo Paganini!! And congratulations, Paganini--you're the 250th character Kid Eternity has summoned!!

Kid continues his charm offensive...

Sadly, he's interrupted...


Renauld de Montauban!! We've already talked about him...he drives away the bad guys!

But the jockey is wounded!!

So who can ride Bayard? Duh!

Keeper calls out Kid, because there were better options for jockey!

So it's race day!

And the race is on!

But there are saboteurs everywhere!



Billy Dixon!!

But wait--there's more chicanery afoot!


 Famous "horse whisperer" John Solomon Rarey!!

But look out, Kid, there's one cheater left:

Really, you need to kill the rider, too?

Don't worry...

John Broughton--yet another boxer!!

While, all of that left Kid and Bayard in last place!!

But not for long--onward, magic horse!!

Go, Kid, go!!

It will be a close finish!!

Woooo, Bayard!!!

Still hung up on that North/South stuff, Colonel? Well, it turns out you were--WRONG!!


Ha!! So much for your anti-Norther prejudice, sir!!

But will it be love for Kid?


NO!!

I guess Keeper was right--you're too young for her, even though this new romance came completely out of nowhere!!


Damn--that's a pretty downbeat note to end a pretty good story on!

The was the 82nd Kid Eternity story, and after 7 new summons (!), the standing are:

Abu 1
Achilles 4
Adam 1
Alden, John 1
Antony, Marc 2
Apollo 1
Aramis 2
Arnold, Benedict 1
Arthur, King 2
Astor, John Jacob 1
Athos 2
Atlas 3
Attila The Hun 1
Attucks, Crispin 1
Baden-Powell, Robert 1
Baker, Lafayette 1
Barry's father 1
Barton, Clara 1
Bayard 1
Bernhardt, Sarah 1
Bertillon, Alphonse 4
Blackhawk 1
Bloodhounds (Legree's) 1
Bluebeard 1
Bolivar, Simon 1
Boone, Daniel 1
Bowie, Jim 1
Boyd, Belle 1
Brady, Diamond Jim 1
Brady, Matthew 1
Breitbart, Zishe 1
Bridger, Jim 1
British Tank crew 1
Broughton, John 1
Bucephalus 2
Bunyan, Paul 3
Byron, George Gordon 2
Caesar, Octavian 1
Cagliostro, Alessandro 1
Calhoun, John C. 1
Canary, Martha “Calamity” 1
Cannon, John W. 1
Capulet, Juliet 1
Carden, Foster 1
Carpenter, Daniel 1
Cave Man 1
Charles, Jacques 1
Cherry Sisters 1
Chopin, Frederic 1
Christian, Fletcher 1
Clancy, Patrick 1
Cleopatra 1
Cody, “Buffalo” Bill 2
Colt, Samuel 1
Columbus, Christopher 2
Corbett, Jim 3
Corcoran, Peter 1
Cortes, Hernan 1
Crillon 1
Crockett, Davy 1
Cronson, Gerald 1
Crusaders 1
Crusoe, Robinson 1
Custer, George Armstrong 2
D'artagnan 2
d'Aubigny. Julie 1
Daedalus 1
Dagger Dan 1
Davis, Richard Harding 1
de Bergerac, Cyrano 2
de Leon, Ponce 1
de Montauban, Renaud 1
de Rais, Gilles 1
Decatur, Stephen 1
Discus Thrower 1
Dixon, Billy 1
Dockstader, Lew 1
Dracula 1
Drake, Sir Francis 1
Dupin, C. Auguste 1
Earhart, Amelia 1
Edison, Thomas 2
Emery 1
Ericson, Leif 2
Fagin 1
Fairbanks, Douglas Sr. 1
Faraday, Michael 1
Fink, Mike 1
Frankenstein's Monster 1
Franklin, Ben 1
Galahad 1
Garibaldi, Giuseppi 1
Geronimo 2
Goliath 1
Gotch, Frank 1
Gothicus, Claudius 1
Grant, Ulysses S. 1
Graymalkin 1
Greb, Harry 1
Griffiths, Albert 1
Grimm, Joe 1
Gulliver, Lemuel 1
Hamilton, Alexander 1
Hart, William S. 1
Hatfield, John 1
Hathorne, John 1
Hauser, Kaspar 1
Henry, Patrick 1
Hercules 2
Hermann, Alexander 1
Hickathrift, Tom 1
Hickok, Wild Bill 1
Hippocrates 1
Hitler, Adolf 1
Hodges, Joe 1
Holmes, Sherlock 4
Hopkins, Matthew 1
Horatius Cocles 1
Houdini, Harry 3
Houston, Sam 1
Hyde, Edward 1
Hyer, Tom 1
Ikhnaton 1
Ismail, Yusuf 1
Jackson, Andrew 1
James, Jesse 1
Javert 2
Jeffries, Jim 1
Johnson, Martin 1
Jones, John Paul 1
Jove 2
Kamehameha 1
Khan, Genghis 2
Kidd, William 1
Lafayette Escradille 1
Lafayette, General 1
Lancelot 2
Larsen, Wolf 1
Laughing Cavalier 1
Laveran, Charles 1
Leander 3
Lee, Robert E. 1
Legree, Simon 1
Leonidas 2
Light Brigade 1
Lincoln, Abraham 1
Lister, Joseph 2
Macbeth's Witches 1
Marable, Fate 1
Marshall, John 1
Masterson, Bat 1
McGrew, Dan 1
Mercury 5
Merlin 1
Mesmer, Franz 1
Milo Of Croton 2
Minutemen 1
Mix, Tom 1
Montague, Romeo 1
Montezuma 1
Morgan, Henry 1
Mounties 1
Mulgrew, Jason 1
Murphy, Charles 1
Napoleon 1
Nation, Carrie 1
Neanderthal 2
Nefertiti 1
Neptune 1
Nightingale, Florence 1
Noah 1
Nobel, Alfred 2
Nobody 2
North Wind 1
Nostradamus 2
O'Brien, David 1
Oakley, Annie 1
Og 1
Orpheus 1
Osceola 1
Paddock, Charley 1
Paganini, Nicolo 1
Pasteur, Louis 1
Penelope 1
Perseus 1
Pheidippides 2
Pied Piper 1
Pinkerton, Allan 1
Plastic Man 1
Pocahontas 1
Poe, Edgar Allen 1
Porthos 4
Post, Wiley 1
Prometheus 1
Quixote, Don 2
Rarey, John S. 1
Reilly, Sidney 1
Revere, Paul 1
Richard the LionHeart 2
Richtofen's Flying Circus 1
Rin-Tin-Tin 2
Robespierre, Maximilien 1
Robin Hood 3
Roc 1
Rogers' Rangers 2
Röntgen, Wilhelm 1
Russell, Lillian 1
Rustum 1
Ryan, Paddy 1
Samson 3
Sandow, Eugen 1
Sayers, Tom 1
Schleyer, Johann 1
Selous, Frederick 1
Serra, Junipero 1
Shakespeare, Willaim 1
Siegfried 1
Silver, Long John 2
Skunk, Jimmy 1
Socrates 1
Sohrab 1
Solomon 1
Stanley, Henry 1
Steinmetz, Charles 2
Stogie 1
Sullivan, John L. 2
Svengali 1
Tecumseh 1
Tell, William 1
Thalfi 1
Thor 3
Thumb, Tom 1
Thurston, Howard 1
Tiglath IV 1
Tuck, Friar 1
Tut-ankh-amen 1
Twain, Mark 1
Ulysses 1
Uncas 1
Valjean, Jean 1
Vercingetorix 1
Villa, Pancho 1
Villon, Francois 1
von Helmholtz, Hermann 1
Vulcan 2
Washington, George 3
Watson, John H 1
Webster, Daniel 2
Whittington, Richard 1
Wright Brothers 1
Xanthippe 1
Zapata, Emiliano 1
Zbyzko, Stanislaus 1
Zorro 1

NEXT--King of the jungle!

From Kid Eternity #56 (1949)

3 comments:

Smurfswacker said...

This opens up a whole new line of enquiry into the already complicated Kid Eternity universe. If Eternity contains everyone who ever lived (except for the handful in Stygia), doesn't that mean that he shares the place with countless others who, like him, died young? He should have no trouble finding girls "his own age." But that invites the question: do dead kids fall in love, date, etc. like their living counterparts? Do they...let's not pursue that line of questioning.

Sometimes it seems as if Eternity contains only all the interesting people who ever lived, and somewhere there's a huge suburb where all the boring everyday folk live. This might limit the Kid's chances on a Saturday night.

While on the subject of age, Kid E. is usually drawn like he is around sixteen, not that much younger than Sugar Pie. On the other hand the jockey she's hot for looks to me like A Much Older Man. Go figure.

In all, your Kid Eternity survey reveals that it was one of the most poorly-thought-out, self-contradictory concepts of the Golden Age--and that's saying something. The only way to handle the mess would be to say the hell with any attempt at logic and just do whatever makes the story work. This was precisely the approach taken by the series' writers.

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