Wednesday, September 17, 2014

With Green Arrow Around, Who Needs Aquaman?!?

Look, I've got some bad news for you Aquaman fans out there--the guy is completely unnecessary.

To wit: recurring Green Arrow villain The Wizard has escaped from prison. And he has a cunning plan how to avoid the Emerald Archer...

Yeah, like that's gonna stop Green Arrow for more than 30 seconds...

So how can Green Arrow fight crime underwater?

With his new weapons, Green Arrow can go completely Thunderball!!

But what about when our hero needs to control sea life? Huh? Huh??

Fact: Trick arrows are like aquatic telepathy, but cooler!!

But what about when The Wizard gets extra clever, like...

...a fake iceberg to hijack ships?!?!

Oliver has an answer for that...


Yes, really!!

"Green Arrow's rain of salt arrows!"just might be the phrase of the week...

The Wizard managed to escape, and he has one last ploy up his sleeve:

A fire-breathing sea-beast awakened by atomic testing?!? Holy crap, it's Godzilla!!

But Oliver's not licked yet...

Sure, I guess a flare arrow would "attract thousands of fish to the scene"? Maybe?

But wait--what the hell is that thing Ollie thought?!?!?

"All my telepathic power"?? Oliver Queen has telepathic power?!? Green Arrow can talk to fishes?!?!?!

Hells, yes:

Holy crap, Ollie can control sea life!!!

And as to the criminals...

Bloggers and criminals agree: "Aquaman himself couldn't have done better than Green Arrow did underwater!"

So, I believed this is CASE CLOSED. Aquaman is unnecessary and redundant!! Oliver Queen can talk to fishes, even without any of that half-Atlantean, King Of The Seas pretentious mumbo-jumbo!! He can stop underwater crime!! And Speedy makes a fine Aqualad!!!

Maybe Arthur can get a job at Seaworld or something...

From World's Finest #145 (1964)


SallyP said...

I love that Ollie and Speedy are THINKING at each other! While underwater.

I guess he DOES have telepathy! Sort of the way that Martian Manhunter could turn sea water into gold...or get gold from it...or something.

Mista Whiskas said...

Is that Godzilla lizard breathing fire...underwater?