Saturday, June 9, 2018

Spoiler Saturday--That's Not Our Saturn Girl!

WARNING: This contains spoilers for last week's Doomsday Clock #5, so if you haven't read it yet (and plan to), well, come back to this rant another day. It will still be here.

SPOILERS commence after 5 harmless pictures...

Still with us? OK, commencing rant...

Look, you all know how displeased I am that DC is continuing to do nothing with the Legion Of Super-Heroes.

Perhaps the most frustrating part is, they have people wanting to do something with the Legion, but no one is allowed to. There are even rumors that a certain big-name writer was willing to sign an exclusive with DC if he could do a Legion book, but he was told, "no."

Why? Well, again, according to rumor, no one at DC is allowed to use the Legion, or the Justice Society, until Geoff Johns has finished Doomsday Clock. Because his Watchmen/DC Universe crossover is going to have such mindbogglingly important impacts on those franchises, that anything done between now and then would just have to rebooted, apparently.

It's a pretty massive bit of ego and chutzpah, frankly. Especially as Doomsday Clock #5 just came out last week, which means there are 7 more bi-monthly issues left (with more delays not unlikely), so it will be over a year until the series finishes.

Still, this means Johns must have big, exciting plans for the Legion, right? Well, now, it's kind of hard to tell. Saturn Girl has been locked in present-day Arkham Asylum for 2 years now, since Rebirth #1. I mean, that's literally it. Once a year or so, we've gotten a panel or two reprising that concept, with zero advancement of the "plot," and zero on any other Legionnaires. Ditto for the Justice Society, where Rebirth #1 had Johnny Thunder in a retirement home raving about "the lightning," and not much since.

Well, finally, last week we got some progress. In Doomsday Clock #5, 102 year old Johnny Thunder has slipped away from the retirement home to search for something, when he's set upon by a group of druggie droogs looking for a score.

But don't worry, nu-Rorschach and Saturn Girl have escaped Arkham, and they are there to rescue him--and to dole out a little of the old ultra-v:


But let's look at Saturn Girl again:

Really? That's Saturn Girl, Imra Ardeen? For the 30th/31st century? From The Legion Of Super-Heroes? Who just looks on completely nonplussed as nu-Rorschach maims and/or kills these guys? (And the fact that she says they would have died anyway so "everything evens out" sure as hell implies that nu-Rorschach is indeed straight-up killing them!)

And wait a did she know all of them were going to overdose that night? Is Johns confusing her with Dream Girl, giving her prophecy powers? Or are we to believe that, because she's from a future (reminder: according to the nu52, the Legion isn't even from Earth-Prime's future!!), she somehow knows the fate of billions of people? She bothered to look up and memorize how every two-bit mugger and drug addict will die?

So this is Geoff Johns' conception of Saturn Girl: content to watch blasély as her ally beats several men to death in front of her?

At least Johnny Thunder had the sensibility to be shocked by the violence.

Look, the story's not over yet (for quite awhile). And we haven't gotten anything resembling actual story or plot advancement yet. So, maybe it will turn out that it's not really Saturn Girl. Or that being trapped in the past has driven her a bit bonkers, so she's not herself. Or, it's all Doc Manhattan's fault. Or something.

But this is also Geoff Johns, who had Superboy-Prime behead Pantha, who turned the Superman of Earth-2 into a villain for Infinite Crisis, who decided that Barry Allen couldn't be a hero unless his mother was murdered. And you've seen above, where one of the founders of the Legion has become, it seems, a sociopathic monster. This is the guy we're going to trust to establish the new status quo with the Legion?

Please, DC. Please, whomever eventually replaces Diane Nelson. Release the Legion. Geoff Johns is not the man who should be re-establishing the hopeful, optimistic future of the DC Universe.

Thus endeth the rant.


SF said...

Is even Rorschach in character here? It's been years since I last read Watchmen, but I remember him being brutal, and he certainly straight up kills the dude who butchered the girl, but outright murdering defeated thugs seems like a stretch to me.

snell said...

Well (SERIES SPOILER) this isn't the original Rorschach, which conveniently answers any inconsistencies.

Madman2001 said...

When all you have is a hammer, every problem looks like a nail. If DC is publishing a big cross-over extravaganza, then you know they will either have a hero become a killer or have a hero killed. It's the only arrow in their quiver. It's the only creativity they can muster. Ridiculous.

Daniel said...

The problem here is the same problem that the movies and TV shows have, and you've correctly pegged its source: the massive ego of Geoff Johns. The man who is custodian of 80 years of history built by hundreds of writers and artists is not interested in publishing/producing anything that doesn't bring *him* (or his chosen co-genius Grant Morrison) creator/writer royalties.

Wayne Allen Sallee said...

I don't know. I'm enjoying DOOMSDAY CLOCK a lot more than I would have thought. Much of that is because we aren't seeing much of Superman. Saturn Girl was put into Arkham because she *stole a sandwich* in REBIRTH. That, I thought, was insane.

I still go with the idea put forth in the BEFORE WATCHMEN mini that the universe Doctor Manhattan created was the nu52 universe. So anything about the LSH is moot (which Earth they are from). If they bring them back, the characters could be as different as were during the Five Years Later era.

What I'm curious about is that Dr. Manhattan has been a member of the Justice League. Since the Rebirth hsasn't done much for me, I can assume the big reveal is that was Martian Manhunter.

And, I'll be honest, I'm don't know if I'd be enjoying DC as much if it wasn't for the fact that I've only been buying 3-4 DC titles a month since 2011. I enjoy PAPER GIRLS more than any single comic DC has put out since the nu52.

snell said...

I have to say that I find the concept of Geoff Johns, co-architect of the nu52, giving Dr. Manhattan the blame for the nu52, is a kind of meta-textual ass-covering that is breathtaking in its craven cynicism.

Wayne Allen Sallee said...

I totally agree. If you know the issue in question, DM & SILK SPECTRE#4, I want to see it as an escape route. DM lets this little swirl of goo drip away and muses what it will become. (Which actually pissed me off, as I took it as a sort of rip-off of Superman caring for that baby universe in Morrison's ALL-STAR SUPERMAN. The reason the nu52 was DOA was because nobody gives a shit about the WildStorm characters anymore. I worked in a comic shop when Image first showed up, and I know DC thought that the nu52 was going to be Image for those 15-20 year olds who were now 35-40 year olds with tons of money.

That said, I appreciate the effort to show that New Earth (or whatever) is more violent because there are more heroes...but we've yet to see Superman, who would be the equivalent of DM, more or less. Johns is not my favorite writer, but at least this thing isn't being written by Scott Lobdell.

Wayne Allen Sallee said...

Left off a line. I meant is more violent,and that is reflected in the actions of the new Rorshach and Saturn Girl, that the characters are like this because it is 2019 on that Earth and so they are poison into being heartless because it is neither Watchmen Earth or 3019. Hope that makes sense. But it still makes it meta in that if characters appear in a Geoff Johns comic they will sooner or later start ripping arms off.