Great Moments In Capitalism!!

I could spend the whole post picking on the dumbass warden...

I mean, Vulture was arrested for being an evil inventor, and you put him in charge of machinery??

But perhaps the more important point is this:



Now, I've made this riff before about other villains (hello, Trapster!). But good old Adrian Toomes has INVENTED A FLYING HARNESS. And instead, of say, patenting that sucker, and being richer than Bill Gates...he goes out and robs a jewelry store. Putz.

Now, as the sequence above makes clear: the flying harness was not some once-in-a-lifetime accident that couldn't be re-created; it didn't require exotic elements like vibranium or such.

Nope, he made a low-tech version of it--from parts in a 1963 prison machine shop, which I'm pretty sure isn't some bastion of high-tech. And Toomes puts the sucker together in his tiny little cell.

So it sure as hell seems like something that would easy enough to mass produce and market and sell. Hell, make 1,000, charge $1,000 for it, and you're a millionaire. And you know that you'd sell more than 1,000...

There's more--the numerous times that the Vulture has been captured, and the harness impounded...surely someone has taken that sucker apart and studied it. Surely someone could see what a flipping goldmine is just laying around.

SO WHY THE HELL DOESN'T EVERYONE IN THE MARVEL UNIVERSE HAVE THEIR OWN GODDAMNED PERSONAL FLYING HARNESS??

Seriously, if I were running for President in Marvel America, my platform is simply this--"If I'm elected, everyone gets their own flying harness. Free!"

I'd win in a landslide, AND take a substantial cut out of greenhouse emissions. I'm thinkin' Nobel Prize, at least.

So to hell with the whining about flying cars...I want my flying harness!!!

From Amazing Spider-Man #7 (1963)