Friday Night Fights--Barsoom Style!!

This current bout of Friday Night Fights is Minimum Clonage--we can't re-use any fighters during these twelve rounds. So let's check my list so far:

Spider-Man
Judomaster
Marl Kincaid
T.H.E. Cat
Namor
Mr. Kotter

Now, I know that I kinda sorta promised to use the Flying Nun this round if I didn't win last week. But A) you cats are soooo not ready for the Flying Nun (trust me), B) I was reading through my back issues of John Carter, Warlord Of Mars this week, and C) I haven't featured any man vs. animal fights lately--and don't forget, Slay Monstrobot is still the first two results when you Google "man on animal action!" Try it!!

So we'll postpone Sister Bertrille until a later week, as this week we feature a fight to the death on Mars (the real Mars, not "Mars-216" orbiting Alpha Centauri, which bears an extremely coincidental resemblance to the Vazquez Rocks, where Kirk fought a Gorn...sigh...this parenthetical aside has circled back and strangled itself with its own nerdiness, hasn't it??)

Anyway, as all good John Carter fights must, we start with his bride, the Princess Deja Thoris, held captive:

With them in the arena:

That, my friends, is a banth, a ten-legged Barsoomian lion, a savage eating machine that cannot be stopped.

So, bye-bye, Princess:

Oh course, the bad guys haven't reckoned with John Carter's extra strength as speed (the result of being an Earthman in Barsoom's lower gravity):





Score: Earth 1, Barsoom 0. Even Spacebooger applauds this outcome, and he was betting on the banth!!

Chris Claremont, Ernie Colon and Frank Springer give you a battle 75,654 times better than anything in that craptacular movie the showed on SyFy in John Cater, Warlord Of Mars #21 (1979).

Remember...if you don't go vote for your favorite fight this week, we might never get anything better than that terrible, wretched abomination of an adaptation of A Princess Of Mars. Oh, Pixar, please save us!!