Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Golden Age Idol--The Sincerest Form Of Flattery

Long-time readers will know that we here at Slay Monstrobot like to take a look at long forgotten Golden Age heroes, and have our illustrious judging panel decide a) who might be worth reviving in modern day, and b) hopefully finding they're public domain so we can get rich off the idea.

We've looked at a lot heroes in Golden Age Idol--but never anybody like:

Well, actually, that's not true. We've seen someone EXACTLY like Red Rube. Except the other guy came first.

Because if imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, Red Rube is absolute most sincerest hero ever.

Come back with us to MLJ's Zip Comics #39 (1943), as Ed Robbins "creates" a "new" superhero...as we find young orphan Reuben Reuben fleeing:

Now, maybe we have seen that before, but let me tell you--Dickens wishes he could have written an orphanage this unpleasant!


A cat o' nine tails?? Really??

Anyway, beaten and scared, Reuben Reuben flees orphanage officials and policeman in the rain, until he finds:

Because America was full of castles in the 1940s--but the greatest generation gave them up to save the world!! Ask your grandparents, kids!

Surprisingly enough, Reuben Reuben is recognized at the castle!!

But the poor unnamed servant dies almost immediately!!

So, Reuben Reuben wakes up to find a dead guy, so naturally he freaks. He runs all about the castle, trying to find a way out, when he discovers:

Yes, all of his ancestors were named Reuben Reuben. Every single one of them. All named Reuben Reuben.

Must have made his Ancestry.com search a lot easier is all I'm saying...

But the hall is filled with more than paintings:

And how, exactly, will these ghostly ancestors help him??



Ah, so the orphan is going to get strength and speed and wisdom and other stuff from dead people. Hmm, this is really starting to sound familiar. How familiar?



Oh, come on now!!

Let's run the Billy Batson checklist here, shall we? Young orphan (check!) meets old guy with long beard (check!) who gives him the super abilities of those long dead (check!), which he accesses with a magic phrase (check!) that summons a meteorological effect (check!) which turns the boy into an adult superhero (check!). Oh, an the orphan would go on to work for a news organization (CHECK!).

Captain Marvel is very, very very flattered, is all I'm saying.

So, Reuben Reuben decides that his first task should be to bust up that evil orphanage. But man, it is a REALLY evil orphanage:

And not just regular REALLY evil--it's Wertham-level evil!!

But, of course, as in so many Captain Marvel stories, the gag is dislodged, and...well, speaking of Wertham:



Really, there's nothing wrong with a shirtless stud who is really a young boy putting an adult over his knee and spanking him...

Someone must have liked Red Rube, because he immediately took over as the cover feature of Zip Comics, displacing Steel Sterling.

But Zip Comics lasted only another year, folding with issue #47. That was the last anyone heard of poor Red Rube. Despite the umpteen revivals of the "Archie" heroes by various hands over the past 65 years, no one has so much as mentioned Red Rube. Maybe it was because he was so heavily derivative of another (better and more well-known) character, that no one knew what to do with him. Or maybe that "costume" just wouldn't cut it in the Comics Code era...put on a shirt, Rube!!

So, I think we're going to have to vote thumbs down here. What do you think, new judge J-Lo?

Ummmm.....uhhhhhh......urrrr.....whatever you say, ma'am.

2 comments:

Lazarus Lupin said...

Ok, the concept can be saved (if concept is the proper term) with a lot of work. Frankly, the world needs more shirtless fellows in capes, if only for Tim Gunn. So how would I fix this?

1) ok, keep the orphan. Why? cause it explains nicely the name of Reuben Reuben. Only someone who really doesn't care about their kid would hang such a name on one.

2) have him escape first to carnival/circus. First it would show him a resourceful lad. He can learn things on the road. He can make interesting friends. More importantly it gives context to the "Hey Rube" thing. The state/orphanage closes in so he escapes...

3) and is picked up by a kindly scientist (not butler in a castle) He hides the kid from the authorities in a small place and some experimental what not escapes causing the boy to lose consciousness. Meanwhile our scientist is bullied into a heart attack so the bad guys run away.

4) Our hero wakes up to dead kindly scientist and a super power. Instead of magic I'm going to go the "Dune" route her and says he name can access the abilities (and physique) of his ancestors even talking with them ala "spirit form" Now able to take the form a strong adult he takes the name "Red Rube" as both a nod to his own name and what you call out in the circus when you need help.

Tadaa!

Lazarus Lupin
http://strangespanner.blogspot.com/
art and review

Siskoid said...

That's possibly the lamest magic word of power in the entire Golden Age. And I'm counting Johnny Thunder's Say You!