After yesterday's doctoral thesis, I felt that I wouldn't be doing my duty as an educator if I didn't present portions of the other two (2!!!) stories from that issue, in convenient panel-sized doses.
LESSON LEARNED FROM A SEMINAL SAMPLE OF SILVER AGE SILLINESS:
A) Lucy Lane is a slut.
B) Lucy Lane chooses her boyfriends based on whether or not male babies find them attractive.
C) Jimmy takes creepy stalking to a whole new level.
A) Wrestling is fixed.
B) Jimmy knows way more about male armpit hair than I'm comfortable with.
C) Lucy Lane had better hope that cuffs and collars match.
D) I think this may be the only comic book reference EVER to armpit hair. Wow. Cool.
A) Metropolis has a county fair??
B)Obviously, not a well-attended county fair, according to the sign
C) Metropolis' citizens are easily amused, apparently. Superman is your resident hero, and the most entertaining stunt you can come up with is to shoot him out of a cannon?
A) Kids!! Mixing chemicals in medicine chests can cause cool things to happen!! Try this at home!
B) This is an immensely disturbing image in about 20 different ways.
A) If you can't tell whether that small human is a baby or a midget, put them in front of a typewriter!! It's a full-proof test!!
B) Perry White cannot tell small children and midgets apart
C) Perry White is scared of midgets.
C) Babies smoking cigars? Hey, this was pre-Surgeon General's report!! It's all cool!