Saturday, January 4, 2014

We've Blown Up 99 Planets, But Earth Isn't One Of Them!!

You guys can keep your Darkseids and your Monguls.

Superman's greatest villains? These guys:

Who the?

You see, some folks become better people when their homeworld is destroyed. These guys? They became super-dicks on a universal scale:

Really? You got a raw deal, so you're going to kill hundreds of billions? WTF, super-dicks?!?

I mean, it's good that you found a hobby and all, but...

So they succeeded in offing 99 worlds, which puts them far ahead of petty death-dealers like Mongul and Darkseid. And you never even heard of them!!

Superman manages to escape before they flip the switch, and, in what even Kal-El admits is "super-super-luck,"...


I sure hope Death of the Endless is waiting for the super-dicks to arrive, to explain how blowing up 99 planets isn't exactly what she wanted from worship. Marvel's Death, however, would continually taunt Thanos with this: "How many planets have you blown up for me, stone-face?!?"

[Fact: if this story were published in the nu52, it would be revealed that the first world these guys destroyed was Krypton...]

From Action Comics #326 (1965), as reprinted in DC Special #21 (1976)

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