Friday, February 1, 2008

Friday Night Fights--Radio Shack Style!!

There are some battles so epic, so groundbreaking, so devastatingly awesome, that the mere comics panel cannot hope to contain them. This is one of them:

This beats Flash Versus Superman any day!That's right, Superman vs. a TRS-80.

Now you may be saying to yourself, Kal-El is from Krypton, and has 10th-level super-intelligence (at least pre-Crisis). Well, my friends, that is absolutely nothing against the 4K power of a TRS-80. Let's watch round one in the seminal example of man versus machine, shall we?

10 PRINT 'HELLO' 20 goto 10 HAHAHAHAHAHA

No! Not the RUN button!!

Sister-kissing timeA tie. A TIE?? A being who could fly faster than the speed of light couldn't think faster than a 1980 computer?

Of course, in fairness, letting the girl write the whole program before starting the race is a little unfair, wouldn't you say? Surely an evaluation of how fast it is should include how long it takes to set up before it could solve the problem.

But we're not about fairness around these parts!! Let's go to the more challenging round two--geometry!!

Man vs Machine AND battle of the sexes? Man, my head is spinningUh-oh, Man of Steel, this guy looks like trouble...

Nooooooo...not pi!!!!

Superman...did you break training?

Down goes Frasier! Down goes Fraiser!!

Alec is a sore winner

The birth of SkyNetHOLY SHIT, Superman got pwned by the TRS-80!! What a knockout!! (And no wonder the Legion got its clock cleaned by Computo, if this is any example of how man vs. machine is gonna go!!)

But don't forget the post-knockout trash talk:

Alec is sooooo lucky Superman has sworn not to kill...Ooooh, Superman, this is pretty ugly. Forget about Brainiac, or Superman vs. Terminator, or Superman vs. the Matrix. Earth is now clearly doomed, because the Man of Tomorrow has been bitch-slapped by the computer of yesterday.

Now, I know you all have questions: Why the hell was Superman pimping TRS-80's? Who is the mysterious super-villain behind this shattering defeat? Can Kal-El get is groove back? And in general, WHAT THE #$%^ IS GOING ON HERE??

All will be answered in tomorrow's post, I promise. In the meantime, remember that one being can kick HAL 9000's ass at converting farenheit to celcius: Bahlactus!! Word.

Credit for this week's most unusual Friday Night Fights ever goes to Cary Bates, Jim Starlin, and Dick Giordano.

1 comment:

CaptainAverage said...

OMG, I actually had this comic.And only 5 or 6 years before those overgrown calculators started showing up in our school district. Gee, why did I give up this little treasure?