Manic Monday--Great Moments In Elevator Pitches!!

One of the toughest things in the world is to entice buyers to try out a new comic book, be it a series or graphic novel.

So I'm completely sympathetic to what creators and editors and publishers have to go through to convince potential customers to part with a few extra shekels and try something new and/or unusual. It can be tough, man.

Unfortunately, given limited space, and the (apparently perceived) idiocy of the public, many companies resort to the dreaded "elevator pitch."

You know the cliche--writer/agent/whatever approaches executive to try and sell new idea, and executive says, "You have until the elevator gets to my floor to sell me. Go." Which is pretty a) stupid, and b) arrogant. And the result is lots of concepts, which might be excitingly detailed and complex and original, having to be dumbed down to quick mash-up soundbites, making the idea sound like a combination of other (successful) ideas in order to convince the exec that the concept might sell. Say, "It's like Harry Potter meets Westworld, except on Mars."

OK, I just made that one up.

But the concept of elevator pitches themselves? Totally not made up. What follows is a selection of descriptions of new series/graphic novels taken verbatim from the publishers' solicitations for books coming out the next couple of weeks.

I shan't names series or creators here. In most case, the creators had little to do with the solicit, and why mock them because of what some editorial assistant wrote under deadline? Also, just because something can be reduced to an elevator pitch, doesn't mean it's not going to be good. I'll be checking out at more than one of these books--but not because of the pitch.

"Part Bruce Campbell, part Marty McFly, all action!"

"...like a John Hughes Godfather movie!

...the demented stepchild of Game Of Thrones, Braveheart and Mark Millar's Kick-Ass!"

"...in the vein of Mad Max and Romeo And Juliet..."

 "Part Cat People, part The Handmaid’s Tale..."

"...combines the paranoia of They Live with Stranger Things."

See what I mean?

As you listen to the announcements of new titles coming from San Diego this coming weekend, keep your ears open for new elevator pitches, as editors and publishers eschew saying "this is new and original and complex and take more than 30 seconds to describe" in favor of saying "this is like Franchise A mashed-up with Franchise B!"

I think this might become a regular feature around here...