Please, Frank Miller, Don't Hurt 'Em

Well, we've all heard the quote from Frank Miller, about when he was offered The Spirit movie, and he realized that "Nobody else can touch this."

And why, exactly, did MC Miller declare to all other filmmakers "U Can't Touch This?" Break it down:

• No one else would have ever thought to give the Spirit super powers.
  
• No one else would have seen the brilliance of making the Octopus an insane genius scientist who discovered the secret to immortality, and who has the exact same super powers as the Spirit
  
• No other writer would have thought to change the Spirit's background from a criminologist and private detective to a rookie cop --because only MC Miller had the depth of understanding to realize rookie cops make much better detectives and crime fighters than those with actual experience and learning. MC Miller gets bonus points for giving the Spirit a new origin (rookie cop mysteriously gunned down) and then not devoting a single syllable afterward to wonder who gunned him down, or why.
  
• Only MC Miller grokked that the Golden Fleece (yes, that Golden Fleece) was actually an impenetrable shield protecting the wearer from all harm, a fact that even escaped the notice of the ancient Greeks.
• Only MC Miller could see that Sand Saref would be a much better character if you ignored her international espionage background and reduced her to a thief with "a thing for bling."
• Giving Denny Colt an intimate physical relationship with Death? Nobody else could touch that (OK, maybe Jim Starlin...)

So thank you, MC Miller, for saving us from those other writers and directors, who never would have thought of introducing any of these "innovations" to the Spirit movie. Hell, such pedestrian filmmakers might have actually made a movie that was tangentially connected to what the Spirit comics were about, and we certainly couldn't have that!!

And on that note...STOP!! Miller time!!