Friday, June 1, 2018

Dial E For Eternity--Ripped From Today's Headlines!!

Look, I wasn't going to do a second Kid Eternity post this week.

But when real-world news stories start echoing 71 year old Kid Eternity stories, well, I gotta listen, right? Maybe Eternity itself wants me to put this out there this week.

We start with a mystery...

As per usual, Keeper and Kid are loafing, when:

Wait--someone beating a rug sounds like gunfire??

Anyway, they're right in time for a gangland execution?


You "suspected" that he "wanted" to squeal? Dude, you need grounds more relative than that to plug someone full of lead!! What the heck, dude?!?

Anyway, Kid calls on some help from the law!

Bat Masterson!!

Taking them in alive turns out to be too tough for Masterson, though.

Loser.

They alert the cops to Joe's body...

...and Libby doles out the exposition.

But Libby knows--snitches get stitches!

Calling Joe back from the dead should help convince her. But...

Don't fret, Kid--it happens to all guys sometimes!

Meanwhile, Keeper reports on a snafu in Eternity's bureaucracy.

At the same time, the thugs get a surprise visitor!


Hmm, maybe Kid's summons did work, after all?

Except, Joe's not taking orders right now!

Well, Kid decides to go to the morgue and examine Joe's body, to make sure he's really dead. The killers do the same, for superstitious reasons...

But nope, Joe is dead, all right.


So the gang-bangers abscond with the body, to bury him and put the ghost to rest.

But Joe has a message for Libby:


Kid can't allow the deceased this much free will, though!



Matthew Hopkins claimed the title of Witchfinder General, which damn well should be a TV series. And Vincent Price played him once in a film! Dear gosh, why doesn't this fellow have his own comic?!?

Oh, because he was a fraud!!

Let that be a lesson to all of you watching those ghost-hunting "reality" shows...

But Joe manages to convince Libby to tell her story to the authorities!!

But...but...
What the...?!?

Kid doesn't know this yet--he's confronting the killers hiding Joe's "corpse."

Milo Of Crotana (sic)!! This is Milo's second summoning. I never would have guessed good old Milo Of Croton (as he's properly known) would be called upon so often.

Whatever you call him, he kicks criminal ass!

And Joe and the cops show up, spilling the truth:




They faked his death to help catch the gang?!? That would never happen in real life!!

Oh, wait, it just did happen--for reals!

So Kid couldn't control Joe, because he wasn't really dead! And there was (for once) no bureaucratic frak-up by the afterlife!

Gee, you'd think Kid or Keeper would have some kind of "death-sense" or something, so they could tell if the person they're dealing with is alive or not. Ah, well...

This was the 34th Kid Eternity story, and our standing are:

Abu 1
Achilles 3
Antony, Marc 1
Aramis 1
Arnold, Benedict 1
Arthur, King 2
Athos 1
Atlas 3
Attila The Hun 1
Attucks, Crispin 1
Baker, Lafayette 1
Barry's father 1
Barton, Clara 1
Bernhardt, Sarah 1
Bertillon, Alphonse 1
Blackhawk 1
Bluebeard 1
Bolivar, Simon 1
Boone, Daniel 1
Breitbart, Zishe 1
Bucephalus 1
Bunyan, Paul 2
Byron, George Gordon 1
Caesar, Octavian 1
Cagliostro, Alessandro 1
Canary, Martha “Calamity” 1
Cannon, John W. 1
Carden, Foster 1
Cherry Sisters 1
Clancy, Patrick 1
Cody, “Buffalo” Bill 2
Colt, Samuel 1
Columbus 1
Corbett, Jim 3
Cronson, Gerald 1
Crusoe, Robinson 1
Custer, George Armstrong 1
D'artagnan 2
de Leon, Ponce 1
Decatur, Stephen 1
Discus Thrower 1
Dockstader, Lew 1
Dracula 1
Drake, Sir Francis 1
Dupin, C. Auguste 1
Edison, Thomas 1
Emery 1
Ericson, Leif 2
Frankenstein's Monster 1
Galahad 1
Gotch, Frank 1
Gothicus, Claudius 1
Grant, Ulysses S. 1
Greb, Harry 1
Griffiths, Albert 1
Hatfield, John 1
Hauser, Kaspar 1
Henry, Patrick 1
Hercules 2
Hickok, Wild Bill 1
Hippocrates 1
Holmes, Sherlock 2
Hopkins, Matthew 1
Houdini 2
Hyde, Edward 1
Hyer, Tom 1
Jackson, Andrew 1
Javert 1
Jeffries, Jim 1
Jones, John Paul 1
Jove 1
Khan, Genghis 1
Kidd, William 1
Lafayette, General 1
Lancelot 1
Laughing Cavalier 1
Leander 2
Lee, Robert E. 1
Leonidas 1
Lincoln, Abraham 1
Lister, Joseph 1
Marable, Fate 1
Masterson, Bat 1
Mercury 4
Milo Of Croton 2
Mulgrew, Jason 1
Murphy, Charles 1
Napoleon 1
Nation, Carrie 1
Nightingale, Florence 1
Noah 1
Nobody 1
Nostradamus 1
O'Brien, David 1
Og 1
Osceola 1
Paddock, Charley 1
Penelope 1
Pheidippides 1
Pinkerton, Allan 1
Plastic Man 1
Porthos 2
Prometheus 1
Quixote, Don 1
Revere, Paul 1
Richard the LionHeart 1
Rin-Tin-Tin 1
Robespierre, Maximilien 1
Robin Hood 2
Russell, Lillian 1
Rustum 1
Ryan, Paddy 1
Samson 2
Sandow, Eugen 1
Schleyer, Johann 1
Siegfried 1
Silver, Long John 1
Skunk, Jimmy 1
Socrates 1
Solomon 1
Sullivan, John L. 2
Tell, William 1
Thor 1
Thurston, Howard 1
Tiglath IV 1
Tut-ankh-amen 1
Twain, Mark 1
Ulysses 1
Uncas 1
Vercingetorix 1
Villa, Pancho 1
Vulcan 1
Washington, George 2
Webster, Daniel 1
Xanthippe 1
Zbyzko, Stanislaus 1

NEXT--High-finance and heel-biting!!

From Kid Eternity #5 (1947)

2 comments:

SF said...

I'm surprised you didn't mention that after all these times where the Kid doesn't do the obvious thing and call on the recently deceased, he finally tries to -- and the guy isn't dead!

snell said...

Fair point.