Friday Night fights--SKZZZZK Style!!

No time for pointless chatter, humble minions, because it's Friday Night Fights!!

It's the summertime...

And after Spider-Man takes out a few henchman, it's time to face the level boss:

Yay!! Everyone loves Electro!!

Nothing is more NYC summer than cooling off in front of an open hydrant!

Spacebooger wishes to assure you that this little tussle did not make Peter Parker late for his wedding.

The worst bachelor party ever is from Amazing Spider-Man Annual #21 (1987), by Jim Shooter (plot), David Michelinie (script), Paul Ryan (pencils) and Vince Colletta (inks)

Now is the time for you to go and vote for my fight. Why? Why not? So go and vote!!

Tales From The Quarter Bin--Big In Japan!!

So, even though we're 2 years past Fox's most recent attempts at a Fantastic Four movie, Marvel is still as tenacious as a wood tick on their policy of refusing to let anyone anywhere acknowledge that the FF actually exist.

Heck, even as recently as yesterday, Marvel is yanking FF licences away, as the forum for the Marvel Heroes game announced. Because heaven forbid that anybody even be able play the FF as characters in an online game!!

No, I will never, ever stop agitating about this rank stupidity.

So time to fight fire with fire: here's an economic reason Marvel should bring back the Fantastic Four!

Yes, they're big in Japan. 

C'mon, Marvel--127 million Japanese fans can't be wrong!!

From Fantastic Four/Iron Man: Big In Japan #1 (2005)

I Am The Cute And Adorable Law!

I've finally got it figured out.

If you want to market Judge Dredd effectively here in America, you've got to go baby Groot--make him cute and lovable!

Like so:

Drokk! We'll sell millions!!

From 2000 AD #2037 (2017)

The New Order Changeth (But Not Enough)!!

I will freely admit that much of this is attributable to nostalgia, that this was the first time I had been buying comics on my own and this was the first "the old order changeth" of that period.

But, in my opinion, this is the best Avengers line-up EVER:

Of course, that line-up lasted exactly 4 panels, as by the end of the issue...

...Zombie Wonder Man showed up!!

Seriously, he should go back to being Zombie Wonder Man!!

Anyway, then the Whizzer started hanging around for awhile..

...and whenever the team ran up against someone too tough...

...the Collector would pull Thor out of time to come and help them!

Then the real Guardians Of The Galaxy showed up...

...and Jocasta started hangin' with them...

...and Ms. Marvel turned up and stuck around...

...and the return of Hawkeye merited it's own (gorgeous) cover...

...and a bunch of other former Avengers showed up, like Hercules and Natasha and T'Challa and Moondragon (boo!)...

...AND THEY ALL DIED!!

Don't worry, they all got better...

...and then the government showed up, and fired all of them except 7, and that line-up changed before the end of the issue, and...

I'm just saying, today's line-ups are too stable. The best Avengers line-ups are the flexible ones, with lots of churning and changes and growing and adapting and leaving and...

From various issues Avengers #151-181 (1976-1979)

This Panel Made Me Laugh

And that's all I have to say on the matter.

From Action Comics #483 (1978)

Satanic Romance Comics!!

Remember when Daimon Hellstrom was "The Son Of Satan?" Before Marvel wussed out and decided that they couldn't mention the "real" Satan anymore, so Daimon became the son of some other demon pretending to Satan? Lame.

Anyway, did you ever wonder how Satan and Daimon's mom hooked up? Sure you have--and it's a tale worthy of a romance comic:

Seriously, that's how Daimon learned his true parentage--reading the diary of his deceased mom. Helluva a thing, no?

Anyhoo, we have the standard chance meeting...

OK, "handsome" in a Herb Trimpe sorta way...

Yup, pretty much the same as any romance comic!!

Crying Daimon Hellstrom is the best Daimon Hellstrom!!

Domestic bliss ensued...

Maybe there was a Girl Scout merit badge for animal sacrifice?!?!

OK, so who hasn't gotten involved with someone who later turned out to be completely evil? Hands?

I thought so.

From Marvel Spotlight #13 (1974)

Manic Monday Triple Overtime--It's A Crazy Idea, But It Just Might Work!!

GBS' main competitor is none too happy about how they keep getting scooped on Superman stories:

What?!? A super-hero taking pictures of his activities and giving them to reporters and (photographers)? Well, I never!! Whoever would think such a thing was possible?

Sssh!!

There really should be a class at journalism school covering ethics and the coverage of super-heroes...

From Action Comics #458 (1976)

Manic Monday Bonus--Lest We Forget...

Just a reminder:

We're only 350 years away from the Battle Of Wolf 359. Start your preparations now.

[Before anybody complains, Voyager is there thanks to a time vortex/anomaly/rift thingy. Don't worry, they didn't change history or anything...]

From Star Trek: Voyager #10 (1997)

Manic Monday--Who Needs A Medusa Mask?!?

Psycho Pirate, you've met your match:

OK, at least when it comes to sadness.

Phil Sanders was a small-time crook who escaped from Plastic Man, and his mug...well, it was almost tear-inducing.

Sanders has been keeping to the straight-and-narrow for awhile to evade capture. But then there's an ad in the paper...

Well, mopey-faced Sanders gets the role...

...but the director thinks he can make him look even sadder!

And damn, is it effective!

And so Sanders begins a crime-spree marked by...tears!

Fortunately, the effects aren't permanent...

"The subtlest form of hold-up!"

Well, worry not, dear readers. Plas fakes his own death, because he knows Sanders had promised to laugh at his funeral. Spell broken!! And then with a little help from a feathered friend...

Of course, in 2017, one could achieve much the same effect by showing people videos of sad kittens on your phone...

From Plastic Man #20 (1949)