Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Slummin' With Red Tornado

As you've no doubt noticed, I've been stumbling across lots of DC stories lately that are set in "the ghetto."

Well, that synchronicity continues, as I pick up the very first Red Tornado solo story ever (!), and he ends up...

...visiting the slums of Gotham City!

Why?!? Just because, I guess!!

Well, Reddy escorts the old woman home, and protects her from 7 different muggings (I exaggerate), while writer JM Dematteis and artists Jose Delbo and Joe Giella emphasize to us just how squalid this particular neighborhood is:

Well, while trying to understand the concept of poor people, RT goes with the old woman to church:

Uh-oh...

O.M.G.

Jim Lee, Dan DiDio, Geoff Johns--you MUST revive this guy for the nu52. Please?

So, what's Mr. Kool's problem with a poor church?



Of course, Red Tornado puts a kibosh on this, and then we get a scene ripped off from Superman Grounded:

I kid...if this were Grounded, Tornado would at this point send a 10 year old to deliver a threatening message to our violent villain. Fortunately, Red Tornado is not that heroic.

But the old woman? Don't mess with her!




Wait--Mr. Kool is firing his thugs...because they couldn't take out a member of the Justice League? That's a pretty high bar for a numbers operator. "You couldn't take out The Flash? Fired!!" Dude, Luthor's not that strict!

But all's well that ends well:

Yeah, he's a GOOD thug who steals churches and beats up parishioners!! And he had a hard life!!

And we conclude:

Hey!! That's the Vision's shtick!! He's the android that gets to cry, not you!!


From Detective Comics #493 (1980)

2 comments:

  1. Sure, they couldn't defeat a Justice League member, but not just ANY member - the freakin' Red TornEmo!

    That's a firing offense as there's no one worse. Yes, I'm counting Vibe and Gypsy.

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  2. Hell, Gunn could have taken that guy. Red Tornado is probably one of my least favorite heroes...but he's still better than Geo-Force.

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