Friday, August 17, 2018

Dial E For Eternity--The Body Count Rises!

One thing you notice when you work your way Kid Eternity stories, is the body count gradually gets higher and higher. It's like he's the Joker or something!!

Oh, there were always been mad scientists or murderers. But most Kid stories early on dealt with hunts for hidden treasure, or helping young folks get their proper inheritance, or stopping crooks running protection rackets. And when we did have killings, it was usually just one or two victims.

Oh, yeah, and Kid stopped Julius Caesar from conquering the 20th century. I almost forgot about that one!

But in the past few stories, we've seen super-villains gain electrical powers and kill dozens, and a crook use Cave Carson's Mighty Mole to kill literally tens of thousands, just to extort $300,000 from a city.

We continue to get a deadlier breed of villain this story, as One-Eye Gootch uses a "fake" lighthouse beacon to cause ships to crash into a local reef:

Meet our villain:

Obviously, authentically British!

And he's a bloodthirsty blackguard:


Of course, it is now that Kid and Keeper decide to show up:

And they see Gootch in his one-man sub:

And his haul?

OK, half a million is a pretty good haul.

And if he's sunk "a hundred" ships, well, we're talking millions, maybe tens of millions. Not a bad haul for 1947.

Of course, I have questions:

A) How does he know which ships are carrying gold? Or did they all carry gold, back in the day?

B) If he's sunken a hundred ships, along with killing thousands of sailors, and stolen millions in gold...where's the Coast Guard? The U.S. Navy? (The story makes clear that this island is in U.S. territory...) Investigations from the shipping companies? The governments or companies buying and selling the gold? Has no one noticed a hundred missing ships? Or is this the Bermuda Triangle?!?!

And before you ask why Gootch doesn't quit while he's ahead, as he's already rich?

Ah, one more job before retirement!!

Kid tries to warn the next passing ship...

...but the mayor of Amity Island is moonlighting as the skipper!

Whom does he call for help?

Fletcher Christian, history's most famous mutineer!!

Christian does a fine job of taking command of the ship:



...but he was too late!

Hey, at least the captain apologized!!

Most of the crew goes off in a lifeboat to get help from the Coast Guard, while our unnamed captain, Kid and Keeper go to explore the lighthouse!

Unfortunately, you shouldn't go into the basement of lighthouses!



Wait...we see the bullet firing! How can the gun be empty?!?

One-Eye laughs at your peril!

Fortunately, Kid can call upon...

Harry Houdini!!

Now this is Houdini's third appearance, boosting him into a tie for second place. Yet his dialogue here sounds like he thinks that it is his first time back from Eternity!

Do the dead Kid summons remember their trips? Maybe the Kid doesn't pull them out of Eternity in "chronological order"? I'm so confused...

Of course, Harry gets them out...


... and in an ominous bit of foreshadowing:

Gootch gets away, and decides to blow up the whole place behind him!

Our heroes are nearly overcome...



Until...


A Roc!!

The big bird gets them away in the nick of time...

Man, that scene goes in the movie!! BOOM!!!

Gootch tries to takes them out...


...but for the second time this story, a gun conveniently runs out of bullets! What the hell--lazy storytelling!!

One-Eye decides to end it all, rather than be caught.

But Kid won't let him escape justice!


Neptune!!

"We don't allow crooks down here!"?? See--who the hell needs Aquaman?!?!?

Kid won't take any reward...

...but he does keep the Roc around for some joy-riding!!

Uh...Keeper? What does that mean? Are you saying what I think you're saying?

This was the 49th Kid Eternity story, and our standing are:

 
Abu 1
Achilles 4
Antony, Marc 2
Aramis 1
Arnold, Benedict 1
Arthur, King 2
Astor, John Jacob 1
Athos 1
Atlas 3
Attila The Hun 1
Attucks, Crispin 1
Baker, Lafayette 1
Barry's father 1
Barton, Clara 1
Bernhardt, Sarah 1
Bertillon, Alphonse 1
Blackhawk 1
Bluebeard 1
Bolivar, Simon 1
Boone, Daniel 1
Bowie, Jim 1
Boyd, Belle 1
Brady, Diamond Jim 1
Breitbart, Zishe 1
Bucephalus 1
Bunyan, Paul 3
Byron, George Gordon 2
Caesar, Octavian 1
Cagliostro, Alessandro 1
Calhoun, John C. 1
Canary, Martha “Calamity” 1
Cannon, John W. 1
Capulet, Juliet 1
Carden, Foster 1
Carpenter, Daniel 1
Cherry Sisters 1
Christian, Fletcher 1
Clancy, Patrick 1
Cleopatra 1
Cody, “Buffalo” Bill 2
Colt, Samuel 1
Columbus, Christopher 2
Corbett, Jim 3
Crockett, Davy 1
Cronson, Gerald 1
Crusoe, Robinson 1
Custer, George Armstrong 1
D'artagnan 2
de Bergerac, Cyrano 1
de Leon, Ponce 1
de Rais, Gilles 1
Decatur, Stephen 1
Discus Thrower 1
Dockstader, Lew 1
Dracula 1
Drake, Sir Francis 1
Dupin, C. Auguste 1
Edison, Thomas 1
Emery 1
Ericson, Leif 2
Frankenstein's Monster 1
Franklin, Ben 1
Galahad 1
Geronimo 1
Goliath 1
Gotch, Frank 1
Gothicus, Claudius 1
Grant, Ulysses S. 1
Greb, Harry 1
Griffiths, Albert 1
Gulliver, Lemuel 1
Hamilton, Alexander 1
Hatfield, John 1
Hauser, Kaspar 1
Henry, Patrick 1
Hercules 2
Hermann, Alexander 1
Hickathrift, Tom 1
Hickok, Wild Bill 1
Hippocrates 1
Holmes, Sherlock 3
Hopkins, Matthew 1
Houdini, Harry 3
Houston, Sam 1
Hyde, Edward 1
Hyer, Tom 1
Jackson, Andrew 1
James, Jesse 1
Javert 1
Jeffries, Jim 1
Jones, John Paul 1
Jove 2
Khan, Genghis 1
Kidd, William 1
Lafayette, General 1
Lancelot 1
Laughing Cavalier 1
Leander 3
Lee, Robert E. 1
Legree, Simon 1
Leonidas 1
Light Brigade 1
Lincoln, Abraham 1
Lister, Joseph 2
Marable, Fate 1
Masterson, Bat 1
Mercury 4
Milo Of Croton 2
Minutemen 1
Mix, Tom 1
Montague, Romeo 1
Montezuma 1
Morgan, Henry 1
Mulgrew, Jason 1
Murphy, Charles 1
Napoleon 1
Nation, Carrie 1
Neanderthal 1
Neptune 1
Nightingale, Florence 1
Noah 1
Nobel, Alfred 1
Nobody 1
Nostradamus 2
O'Brien, David 1
Oakley, Annie 1
Og 1
Osceola 1
Paddock, Charley 1
Penelope 1
Perseus 1
Pheidippides 1
Pinkerton, Allan 1
Plastic Man 1
Porthos 2
Post, Wiley 1
Prometheus 1
Quixote, Don 1
Revere, Paul 1
Richard the LionHeart 1
Rin-Tin-Tin 2
Robespierre, Maximilien 1
Robin Hood 2
Roc 1
Rogers' Rangers 1
Russell, Lillian 1
Rustum 1
Ryan, Paddy 1
Samson 2
Sandow, Eugen 1
Sayers, Tom 1
Schleyer, Johann 1
Siegfried 1
Silver, Long John 2
Skunk, Jimmy 1
Socrates 1
Solomon 1
Sullivan, John L. 2
Tecumseh 1
Tell, William 1
Thalfi 1
Thor 1
Thumb, Tom 1
Thurston, Howard 1
Tiglath IV 1
Tuck, Friar 1
Tut-ankh-amen 1
Twain, Mark 1
Ulysses 1
Uncas 1
Vercingetorix 1
Villa, Pancho 1
Villon, Francois 1
Vulcan 1
Washington, George 3
Watson, John H 1
Webster, Daniel 2
Xanthippe 1
Zbyzko, Stanislaus 1

NEXT--The 50th Kid Eternity story--featuring the Kid in War Of The Worlds!!

From Kid Eternity #8 (1947)

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