Supergirl Amuck

A strained analogy here...bear with me.

You remember the all-time classic Looney Tune "Duck Amuck?" Where Daffy keeps getting jerked about by a demented animator? That no matter what story Daffy's supposed to be in, the crazy dude with the pencil and paintbrush warps things to his own choosing, usually humiliating Daffy?

Well, Daffy is Supergirl...and the demented animator is Geoff Johns.

OK, I said it was strained. But take a look at two comics out this week.

Exhibit A is The Brave and the Bold #17, starring Supergirl and Raven. Written by Marv Wolfman, the story sure seems to be set in current continuity, as Raven is in her little goth girl goes to high school setting from the recent Raven mini-series. And Marv has Supergirl's origin the same as Jeph Loeb had it in the beginning of her current series: Kara's father was Jor-El's brother Zor-El. It turns out that Zor-El was an evil bastard, hated his brother, and sent Kara to Earth to kill Kal-El. In fact, that's what this whole story is about--Supergirl seeks out Raven's help because she can't deal with the memories.

Unfortunately, Marv apparently didn't get the memo: nothing counts in DC wikinuity unless Geoff Johns says it does.


Because exhibit B is Action Comics #869. In which Geoff Johns not only gives Supergirl the 4th different origin she's had since her latest debut in 2004. Yes, 4th--pathetic, isn't it?

But Johns also completely ignores/contradicts what Wolfman is doing, and what's been done in Supergirl's own mag. Think about this: if we accept John's version of Supergirl's origin, then virtually every single story from the first Supergirl's current run cannot have happened (not that that's a bad thing, necessarily, but still...). But the Black Kryptonite story? Wiped out. One Year Later in Kandor? Gone. The Phantom Zone story? Never happened.

Just like Daffy thinking he's going to be in one type of cartoon, but being thrust by a mischievous creator into something else, Wolfman had the rug completely pulled out from under his story. What, doesn't DC have editors, to warn writers that characters they're about to use have had their origins changed? Two stories in the same week with contradictory origins? Welcome back to DC, Marv...

And then there's Johns. Just how powerful is the guy, anyway? "I don't care what the origin in your own magazine is--it's now what I say it is!!" He's the demented animator. DC reality is what he says it is--he can change it on a whim! It's wikinuity.

Sure we could find some ways around this contradiction. The Zor-El in Action could be a fake, or a liar; Kara's memories could turn out to be fakes (planted by Darkseid??). But such concerns are pointless, because Johns doesn't care about contradictions. The DC Universe is his canvas, other artists' work be damned. So don't get used to the back story in any DC comic you enjoy. Because at some point, Johns will simply make those stories vanish.

See, we never needed Superboy-Prime to punch the universe. We don't need Darkseid's death to "cause continuity ripples throughout the DC Universe." We just need Geoff Johns to say, "Because I said so."

Ain't he a stinker?