This is a job for:
Now, Mercury is pretty damn fast...
So the crooks--miraculously unhurt--get away!!
Nope.
If you're slightly more cynical, you figure that Kid Eternity convinced the doctor to tell Joe he was dying--or summoned a doc from Eternity--to motivate Joe to do his damn job. Same result.
Again, no.
Oh, the story does its best to fool us into thinking it's going in that direction:
But Kid and Keeper do skedaddle, and...
One good thing about Kid Eternity's job: when you fuck up and get someone killed, you get instant feedback!!
And he doesn't take kindly to gangsters!
Meanwhile,, that story won't write itself, so...
So the dead man does tell the tale...
Anyway, back in Eternity...
The was the 54th Kid Eternity story, and our standing are...
| Abu | 1 |
| Achilles | 4 |
| Adam | 1 |
| Antony, Marc | 2 |
| Apollo | 1 |
| Aramis | 1 |
| Arnold, Benedict | 1 |
| Arthur, King | 2 |
| Astor, John Jacob | 1 |
| Athos | 1 |
| Atlas | 3 |
| Attila The Hun | 1 |
| Attucks, Crispin | 1 |
| Baker, Lafayette | 1 |
| Barry's father | 1 |
| Barton, Clara | 1 |
| Bernhardt, Sarah | 1 |
| Bertillon, Alphonse | 1 |
| Blackhawk | 1 |
| Bluebeard | 1 |
| Bolivar, Simon | 1 |
| Boone, Daniel | 1 |
| Bowie, Jim | 1 |
| Boyd, Belle | 1 |
| Brady, Diamond Jim | 1 |
| Breitbart, Zishe | 1 |
| Bucephalus | 2 |
| Bunyan, Paul | 3 |
| Byron, George Gordon | 2 |
| Caesar, Octavian | 1 |
| Cagliostro, Alessandro | 1 |
| Calhoun, John C. | 1 |
| Canary, Martha “Calamity” | 1 |
| Cannon, John W. | 1 |
| Capulet, Juliet | 1 |
| Carden, Foster | 1 |
| Carpenter, Daniel | 1 |
| Cherry Sisters | 1 |
| Christian, Fletcher | 1 |
| Clancy, Patrick | 1 |
| Cleopatra | 1 |
| Cody, “Buffalo” Bill | 2 |
| Colt, Samuel | 1 |
| Columbus, Christopher | 2 |
| Corbett, Jim | 3 |
| Crockett, Davy | 1 |
| Cronson, Gerald | 1 |
| Crusoe, Robinson | 1 |
| Custer, George Armstrong | 1 |
| D'artagnan | 2 |
| Davis, Richard Harding | 1 |
| de Bergerac, Cyrano | 2 |
| de Leon, Ponce | 1 |
| de Rais, Gilles | 1 |
| Decatur, Stephen | 1 |
| Discus Thrower | 1 |
| Dockstader, Lew | 1 |
| Dracula | 1 |
| Drake, Sir Francis | 1 |
| Dupin, C. Auguste | 1 |
| Edison, Thomas | 1 |
| Emery | 1 |
| Ericson, Leif | 2 |
| Frankenstein's Monster | 1 |
| Franklin, Ben | 1 |
| Galahad | 1 |
| Geronimo | 2 |
| Goliath | 1 |
| Gotch, Frank | 1 |
| Gothicus, Claudius | 1 |
| Grant, Ulysses S. | 1 |
| Greb, Harry | 1 |
| Griffiths, Albert | 1 |
| Gulliver, Lemuel | 1 |
| Hamilton, Alexander | 1 |
| Hatfield, John | 1 |
| Hauser, Kaspar | 1 |
| Henry, Patrick | 1 |
| Hercules | 2 |
| Hermann, Alexander | 1 |
| Hickathrift, Tom | 1 |
| Hickok, Wild Bill | 1 |
| Hippocrates | 1 |
| Hodges, Joe | 1 |
| Holmes, Sherlock | 3 |
| Hopkins, Matthew | 1 |
| Houdini, Harry | 3 |
| Houston, Sam | 1 |
| Hyde, Edward | 1 |
| Hyer, Tom | 1 |
| Jackson, Andrew | 1 |
| James, Jesse | 1 |
| Javert | 1 |
| Jeffries, Jim | 1 |
| Jones, John Paul | 1 |
| Jove | 2 |
| Khan, Genghis | 2 |
| Kidd, William | 1 |
| Lafayette, General | 1 |
| Lancelot | 1 |
| Laughing Cavalier | 1 |
| Leander | 3 |
| Lee, Robert E. | 1 |
| Legree, Simon | 1 |
| Leonidas | 1 |
| Light Brigade | 1 |
| Lincoln, Abraham | 1 |
| Lister, Joseph | 2 |
| Marable, Fate | 1 |
| Masterson, Bat | 1 |
| Mercury | 5 |
| Milo Of Croton | 2 |
| Minutemen | 1 |
| Mix, Tom | 1 |
| Montague, Romeo | 1 |
| Montezuma | 1 |
| Morgan, Henry | 1 |
| Mulgrew, Jason | 1 |
| Murphy, Charles | 1 |
| Napoleon | 1 |
| Nation, Carrie | 1 |
| Neanderthal | 1 |
| Neptune | 1 |
| Nightingale, Florence | 1 |
| Noah | 1 |
| Nobel, Alfred | 1 |
| Nobody | 1 |
| Nostradamus | 2 |
| O'Brien, David | 1 |
| Oakley, Annie | 1 |
| Og | 1 |
| Osceola | 1 |
| Paddock, Charley | 1 |
| Pasteur, Louis | 1 |
| Penelope | 1 |
| Perseus | 1 |
| Pheidippides | 1 |
| Pinkerton, Allan | 1 |
| Plastic Man | 1 |
| Porthos | 2 |
| Post, Wiley | 1 |
| Prometheus | 1 |
| Quixote, Don | 1 |
| Revere, Paul | 1 |
| Richard the LionHeart | 1 |
| Rin-Tin-Tin | 2 |
| Robespierre, Maximilien | 1 |
| Robin Hood | 3 |
| Roc | 1 |
| Rogers' Rangers | 1 |
| Russell, Lillian | 1 |
| Rustum | 1 |
| Ryan, Paddy | 1 |
| Samson | 2 |
| Sandow, Eugen | 1 |
| Sayers, Tom | 1 |
| Schleyer, Johann | 1 |
| Serra, Junipero | 1 |
| Siegfried | 1 |
| Silver, Long John | 2 |
| Skunk, Jimmy | 1 |
| Socrates | 1 |
| Solomon | 1 |
| Steinmetz, Charles | 1 |
| Sullivan, John L. | 2 |
| Tecumseh | 1 |
| Tell, William | 1 |
| Thalfi | 1 |
| Thor | 2 |
| Thumb, Tom | 1 |
| Thurston, Howard | 1 |
| Tiglath IV | 1 |
| Tuck, Friar | 1 |
| Tut-ankh-amen | 1 |
| Twain, Mark | 1 |
| Ulysses | 1 |
| Uncas | 1 |
| Vercingetorix | 1 |
| Villa, Pancho | 1 |
| Villon, Francois | 1 |
| Vulcan | 1 |
| Washington, George | 3 |
| Watson, John H | 1 |
| Webster, Daniel | 2 |
| Xanthippe | 1 |
| Zbyzko, Stanislaus | 1 |
NEXT--What. The. Hell. Is. In. The Briefcase???
From Kid Eternity #9 (1948)
Ah, the 1940s. When you can receive word of a fatal heart condition while smoking in the doctor's office. I mean, I can't say for sure why Joe's heart is in bad shape, but I can make a guess as to some possible causes... :P
ReplyDeleteDo you remember sometime in the 70s, Kid Eternity was retconned into being Captain Marvel Jr.'s long-lost brother? Pretty sure the story was written by E. Nelson Bridwell. I liked that. Much better than what happened in the 90s, anyway.
ReplyDeleteWe'll be getting there sometime next year, James...
ReplyDelete"nom de nom" ????
ReplyDeletePoor Achilles. Finally beaten out of first place by Mercury
ReplyDeleteJason--don't mourn for Achilles yet. There's a ways to go yet, and trust me, he's in this for the long haul...
ReplyDeleteHow many times does he get his heel shot or stabbed?
ReplyDelete