Wednesday, August 22, 2018

Dial E For Eternity--The War Of The Worlds!! Or, The Green Slime!!

Back in the day, the wasn't much celebration for "round number" anniversary issues. That mainly came from the Silver and Bronze ages. In the Golden Age, issue #50 was just another issue.

Consider it a pleasant bit of serendipity, then, as Hit Comics #50 just happens to contain the 50th Kid Eternity story!! And it involves the Martian invasion of Earth!!

Kid and Keeper see a "meteor" heading for Earth. But that's no meteor!!

Yup, it's chock full of Martians--including the Emperor!!


Hey!! You can't talk about us that way!! Even if it's true!!

Kid goes to warn the worst astronomer in the world:


Hey, I appreciate the ERB name drop!

You'd think it would be a great discovery for our guy,. but...

He actually is the world's worst astronomer!!

But, despite "every observatory in the world" seeing the ship, no one knows where it landed! So Kid calls upon...

Junipero Serra!!

Now, this is another of those summons that might not pass muster these day, as Serra is a pretty controversial figure for his relations with Native Americans during the Spanish colonization of California.

But he is surprisingly effective at tracking down Martians!!


Kid spies upon their evil machinations...

Good thought, Keeper...but too little, too late!

So what's the deal with those mini-spaceships? Perhaps they're drones, delivering packages from Martian Amazon?

Nope, they're spurting out green slime, to terraform the planet!!!

And nothing can stop it!!

Yup, we're losing this War Of The Worlds pretty badly!



Well, Kid tries to escape the slime are with a radio reporter, but no success!


Wait a minute...

Louis Pasteur!!

It's another nice bit of serendipity, as The Story Of Louis Pasteur was on Turner Classic Movies earlier today!!

But maybe, just maybe, the Kid is kind of foolish for calling on the father of modern antibiotics? Because despite the claim that "mould is a bacteria," it only took Google .59 seconds to declare:

Oops!!

So perhaps it's no surprise that Louis is singularly ineffective at stopping the green slime!


So, how do they escape?

Believe it or not, this is the second time Kid has summoned Bucephalus!!

And at least he's more effective at his job than Pasteur!


But still, the reporter gets got!

But Kid and Keeper manage to catch a Martian...

...take his ship back to Martian HQ...

...where Kid gets deliberately captured...


...because even in 1948, he knows the Emperor will monologue and give them to key to victory!

See--it's not mould, Kid--it's pure energy!!

So whom does Kid call upon now?

Charles Proteus Steinmetz!! One of the greatest mathematical and electrical geniuses of all time!!

So how does Steinmetz stop a complicated alien machine?

By bashing it with a monkey wrench?!?! Really? That's akin to summoning Einstein to beat spies by dropping a banana peel in front of them!! Why summon Steinmetz if he's not going to do something science-y and clever?

Anyway, that monkey wrench beats the whole alien mothership, and we learn that the deadly Martian bio-warfare wasn't really deadly at all!

And all is well that ends well!!

As mentioned, this grand tale was the 50th Kid Eternity story, and here are the updated standings (in order of number of summonses):

Achilles 4
Mercury 4
Atlas 3
Bunyan, Paul 3
Corbett, Jim 3
Holmes, Sherlock 3
Houdini, Harry 3
Leander 3
Washington, George 3
Antony, Marc 2
Arthur, King 2
Bucephalus 2
Byron, George Gordon 2
Cody, “Buffalo” Bill 2
Columbus, Christopher 2
D'artagnan 2
Ericson, Leif 2
Hercules 2
Jove 2
Lister, Joseph 2
Milo Of Croton 2
Nostradamus 2
Porthos 2
Rin-Tin-Tin 2
Robin Hood 2
Samson 2
Silver, Long John 2
Sullivan, John L. 2
Webster, Daniel 2
Abu 1
Aramis 1
Arnold, Benedict 1
Astor, John Jacob 1
Athos 1
Attila The Hun 1
Attucks, Crispin 1
Baker, Lafayette 1
Barry's father 1
Barton, Clara 1
Bernhardt, Sarah 1
Bertillon, Alphonse 1
Blackhawk 1
Bluebeard 1
Bolivar, Simon 1
Boone, Daniel 1
Bowie, Jim 1
Boyd, Belle 1
Brady, Diamond Jim 1
Breitbart, Zishe 1
Caesar, Octavian 1
Cagliostro, Alessandro 1
Calhoun, John C. 1
Canary, Martha “Calamity” 1
Cannon, John W. 1
Capulet, Juliet 1
Carden, Foster 1
Carpenter, Daniel 1
Cherry Sisters 1
Christian, Fletcher 1
Clancy, Patrick 1
Cleopatra 1
Colt, Samuel 1
Crockett, Davy 1
Cronson, Gerald 1
Crusoe, Robinson 1
Custer, George Armstrong 1
de Bergerac, Cyrano 1
de Leon, Ponce 1
de Rais, Gilles 1
Decatur, Stephen 1
Discus Thrower 1
Dockstader, Lew 1
Dracula 1
Drake, Sir Francis 1
Dupin, C. Auguste 1
Edison, Thomas 1
Emery 1
Frankenstein's Monster 1
Franklin, Ben 1
Galahad 1
Geronimo 1
Goliath 1
Gotch, Frank 1
Gothicus, Claudius 1
Grant, Ulysses S. 1
Greb, Harry 1
Griffiths, Albert 1
Gulliver, Lemuel 1
Hamilton, Alexander 1
Hatfield, John 1
Hauser, Kaspar 1
Henry, Patrick 1
Hermann, Alexander 1
Hickathrift, Tom 1
Hickok, Wild Bill 1
Hippocrates 1
Hopkins, Matthew 1
Houston, Sam 1
Hyde, Edward 1
Hyer, Tom 1
Jackson, Andrew 1
James, Jesse 1
Javert 1
Jeffries, Jim 1
Jones, John Paul 1
Khan, Genghis 1
Kidd, William 1
Lafayette, General 1
Lancelot 1
Laughing Cavalier 1
Lee, Robert E. 1
Legree, Simon 1
Leonidas 1
Light Brigade 1
Lincoln, Abraham 1
Marable, Fate 1
Masterson, Bat 1
Minutemen 1
Mix, Tom 1
Montague, Romeo 1
Montezuma 1
Morgan, Henry 1
Mulgrew, Jason 1
Murphy, Charles 1
Napoleon 1
Nation, Carrie 1
Neanderthal 1
Neptune 1
Nightingale, Florence 1
Noah 1
Nobel, Alfred 1
Nobody 1
O'Brien, David 1
Oakley, Annie 1
Og 1
Osceola 1
Paddock, Charley 1
Pasteur, Louis 1
Penelope 1
Perseus 1
Pheidippides 1
Pinkerton, Allan 1
Plastic Man 1
Post, Wiley 1
Prometheus 1
Quixote, Don 1
Revere, Paul 1
Richard the LionHeart 1
Robespierre, Maximilien 1
Roc 1
Rogers' Rangers 1
Russell, Lillian 1
Rustum 1
Ryan, Paddy 1
Sandow, Eugen 1
Sayers, Tom 1
Schleyer, Johann 1
Serra, Junipero 1
Siegfried 1
Skunk, Jimmy 1
Socrates 1
Solomon 1
Steinmetz, Charles 1
Tecumseh 1
Tell, William 1
Thalfi 1
Thor 1
Thumb, Tom 1
Thurston, Howard 1
Tiglath IV 1
Tuck, Friar 1
Tut-ankh-amen 1
Twain, Mark 1
Ulysses 1
Uncas 1
Vercingetorix 1
Villa, Pancho 1
Villon, Francois 1
Vulcan 1
Watson, John H 1
Xanthippe 1
Zbyzko, Stanislaus 1


NEXT--The Hatfields Vs. The McCoys...Vs. Genghis Khan!!!

From Hit Comics #50 (1948)

1 comment:

  1. It's not just using a monkey wrench, it's knowing where to use a monkey wrench!

    ReplyDelete