Wednesday, May 23, 2018

Dial E For Eternity--Sow The Wind, Reap The Whirlwind!!

Kid Eternity learns a very important lesson this week: revolutions can be difficult things to manage.

We start at an unnamed Caribbean island...

Unfortunately, it's an island run by an evil banana plantation owner, so you get things like this ruining the postcard vistas:

Kid tries to intervene...


That's true. Who needs bare hands when you can call upon anyone from history or legend. Like...

Richard The Lion-Hearted!!



Unfortunately, they were too late to save the man being whipped.

Kid leaves Keeper to take of the body, while he goes off to find more about the evil Don Pablo.

Big mistake, because...



Yup...without Keeper around, no powers.

Now, I won't say this story is padded, but...yeah, it's pretty damn padded. Kid can't summon anyone, he encounters a lovelorn couple (whose story is never resolved), he keeps escaping and getting captured. It's pretty tedious, actually.

See?

Trust me, you're not missing much.

Eventually, Keeper shows up, so the story can get going again.

So the kid calls upon...

Pancho Villa!!
And Pancho promptly launches a revolution!

But:

Revolutions have consequences, kid. Those peons are getting gunned down!! Surely there was a more bloodless way you could come up with to end Don Pablo??

Still, Villa gets results:


Ah, but now that the peons are free...what will they do?

Oops--violence had begat violence, and things are getting out of control.

Who do you call to reign in out of control mobs?

Robespierre!

Wait, Robespierre?

Kid, have you actually read any history?

Granted, there is disagreement among historians about the role and impact of Robespierre in the wake of the French Revolution, but there is little doubt that he at least tolerated, if not encouraged, the excesses of the Reign Of Terror.

And, therefore, it's no surprise when...

Uh-oh...



Well, that will solve things, right?

Nope:


How are you going to get out of this mess, Kid?

Simon Bolivar!!
Now, Bolivar knows how to calm the folks down!



Before we get too excited, we should remind ourselves that the Bolivian constitution he wrote called for a president who served for life and hereditary senate seats. So maybe the campesinos shouldn't be so quick to cheer his "lawful government."

Still, it's a lot calmer than a bloodbath, so Kid can leave with a (mostly) clean conscience.

Ummm...maybe next time, Kid, just summon Hercules and have him take out the bad guy? You might not be able to contain the next revolution you start...

Anyhoo, after 32 stories, here's where the Kid Eternity Summoning Standings are:

Abu 1
Achilles 3
Antony, Marc 1
Aramis 1
Arnold, Benedict 1
Arthur, King 2
Athos 1
Atlas 2
Attila The Hun 1
Attucks, Crispin 1
Baker, Lafayette 1
Barry's father 1
Bernhardt, Sarah 1
Bertillon, Alphonse 1
Blackhawk 1
Bluebeard 1
Bolivar, Simon 1
Boone, Daniel 1
Breitbart, Zishe 1
Bucephalus 1
Bunyan, Paul 2
Byron, George Gordon 1
Caesar, Octavian 1
Cagliostro, Alessandro 1
Canary, Martha “Calamity” 1
Cannon, John W. 1
Carden, Foster 1
Cherry Sisters 1
Clancy, Patrick 1
Cody, “Buffalo” Bill 2
Colt, Samuel 1
Columbus 1
Corbett, Jim 3
Cronson, Gerald 1
Crusoe, Robinson 1
Custer, George Armstrong 1
D'artagnan 2
de Leon, Ponce 1
Decatur, Stephen 1
Discus Thrower 1
Dockstader, Lew 1
Dracula 1
Drake, Sir Francis 1
Dupin, C. Auguste 1
Edison, Thomas 1
Emery 1
Ericson, Leif 2
Frankenstein's Monster 1
Galahad 1
Gotch, Frank 1
Grant, Ulysses S. 1
Greb, Harry 1
Griffiths, Albert 1
Hatfield, John 1
Hauser, Kaspar 1
Henry, Patrick 1
Hercules 1
Hickok, Wild Bill 1
Hippocrates 1
Holmes, Sherlock 2
Houdini 2
Hyde, Edward 1
Hyer, Tom 1
Jackson, Andrew 1
Javert 1
Jeffries, Jim 1
Jones, John Paul 1
Khan, Genghis 1
Kidd, William 1
Lafayette, General 1
Lancelot 1
Laughing Cavalier 1
Leander 2
Lee, Robert E. 1
Leonidas 1
Lincoln, Abraham 1
Marable, Fate 1
Mercury 3
Milo Of Croton 1
Mulgrew, Jason 1
Murphy, Charles 1
Napoleon 1
Nation, Carrie 1
Nightingale, Florence 1
Noah 1
Nobody 1
Nostradamus 1
O'Brien, David 1
Osceola 1
Paddock, Charley 1
Penelope 1
Pheidippides 1
Pinkerton, Allan 1
Plastic Man 1
Porthos 2
Prometheus 1
Quixote, Don 1
Revere, Paul 1
Richard the LionHeart 1
Rin-Tin-Tin 1
Robespierre, Maximilien 1
Robin Hood 2
Russell, Lillian 1
Rustum 1
Ryan, Paddy 1
Samson 2
Sandow, Eugen 1
Schleyer, Johann 1
Siegfried 1
Silver, Long John 1
Skunk, Jimmy 1
Socrates 1
Solomon 1
Sullivan, John L. 2
Tell, William 1
Thor 1
Thurston, Howard 1
Tiglath IV 1
Tut-ankh-amen 1
Twain, Mark 1
Ulysses 1
Uncas 1
Vercingetorix 1
Villa, Pancho 1
Vulcan 1
Washington, George 2
Webster, Daniel 1
Xanthippe 1
Zbyzko, Stanislaus 1

NEXT--Wronging the Wright Brothers...with dinosaurs?!?

From Hit Comics #45 (1947)

1 comment:

  1. Although it was wrapped up neatly with a bow at the end, like most stories of its time, I give this story credit for its realistic treatment of violence and its consequences.

    ReplyDelete