Strange things can happen if you're the secretary to physicists:
Ah, incredible coincidence, the oxygen for Golden Age comics stories!!
(Also, please note, just as with Johnny Quick's mantra, none of that is actually formulas...I'm just sayin'.)
So...
Though as a rookie to the super-speed stuff, she hasn't quite got her control down yet:
Hey, that does sound kinda fun...but no, Johnny is kind of a sexist bastard!
So he hatches a vile scheme to keep all the super-speed glory for men folks alone...
Asshole.
But Joanie won't be deterred. She comes up with a fairly bitchin' costume for the era...
And as they go about to round up some rare animals she accidentally released in her first burst of speed, well, she pretty much proves herself superior to him in every way:
Then, in an episode stolen by the B-52s:
So she's better than you in every possible way, Johnny...but don't give up hope! There's still one critter left to round up!
Oh, Johnny, you douche...
Johnny Quick--dickweed!
You son of a bitch!
Johnny Quick--smasher of dreams, and history's greatest monster!!
I hope someone shows this story to Jesse Quick...
From Adventure Comics #181 (1952), as reprinted in World's Finest #198 (1970)
What an incredible douche-canoe!
ReplyDeleteYeah. Joanie Swift is, like, the world's nicest person.
ReplyDeleteAre we sure Libby wasn't just a beard?