You're stuck with Mr. Sensitivity!! Sheesh, do you need to be such a downer, Narrator? Would it kill you to be a little positive?Perhaps...but he has good reason to be negative, because our protagonist is going to meet:
So, these astronauts crash land on Venus, and the co-pilot is dead. But Rod Crenshaw lives on to meet the evillest life-form ever:
Yes, Rod, the two sets of eyes is the freakiest thing there...oh, wait, maybe it's THIS:
This bears absolutely no resemblance whatsoever to Starro or the Star Trek episode Operation: Annihilate. Nope, we would never suggest that they borrowed concepts from a 1952 Basil Wolverton horror comic. Nope.But, completely unlike Starro or the slimy pancake thingies from Operation: Annihilate, you really really REALLY don't want these things to land on you:
You're not being very helpful, Mr. Negative Narrator!!Gaze in terror as head Brain Bat reveals his evil plan (and Basil Wolverton proceeds to scare the bejeezus out of little kiddies):
AAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!Well, Crenshaw manages to make the ship really crash as they attempt to land on Earth. Threat over!!
But no, Mister Glass-Half-Empty Narrator is having none of that!!
Fortunately:
YAY!! Dead aliens!!Well, all's well that ends well, right?
NOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Damn you Mister How-Are-You-Narrating-If-Earth-Has-Been-Conquered!!!!!!!!Maybe Rod should have tried trade negotiations...
From Mister Mystery #7 (1952)
That final panel....simultaneously terrifying and vaguely obscene!.
ReplyDelete(Is that a mouth, or......? EEWWWWW!)
Interesting to see that Wolverton had a horror comics phase before he spent (seemingly) the rest of his career life drawing buck-toothed dorks and eye-popping grotesqueries.
The Brain-Bats are my new favorite monster. I want to put them in an RPG near me soon!
ReplyDeleteAnd I've always hated second person singular narration. It's not like I can choose which page to turn to in order to avoid wearing a Brain-Bat-Hat (new Holloween costume idea!).
Re: "Damn you Mister How-Are-You-Narrating-If-Earth-Has-Been-Conquered!!!!!!!!"
ReplyDeleteIt's obvious, isn't it? The Brain-Bats *ARE* the Narrator? That's exactly *why* he happens to be so snarky and superior to the actions of the humans throughout the tale?