Wednesday, February 3, 2010

The Fourth Member--Shocking, Positively Shocking

It really warms my heart when I see people taking my advice.

For awhile now, I've been ragging on the Frightful Four to clean up their act. Time after time, they've used the same ridiculous, failed strategy. And time after time they've gotten their butts handed to them, always somehow finding a way to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.

This, however, they do show some rudimentary learning ability. So maybe, just maybe, this is the time they will succeed!! let's take a look at Fantastic Four #218 (1980):

Now, not to spoil the surprise or anything, but it's going to turn out that that's not Spider-Man scaling the Baxter Building. What gives?

Well, it turns out that this is the continuation of a story that began in Spectacular Spider-Man #42 (which is hiding somewhere in the disorganized mountain I call a collection, so no scans from that issue. Sorry). In that issue, Spidey is lured by a message from a fake Human Torch...

...and bushwhacked by the Frightful Four...who've added a new member: Electro!!

Now, this is the first sign of an increased (albeit still elementary) cognitive ability by the frightful ones. After decades of fourth members whom they apparently just find wandering the streets, this time they go after an established bad guy, who is eager to join. After decades of mysterious unknowns who later turn out to be good guys after all, they choose a powerful guy who is pretty clearly in the evil camp for good.

Anyway, if that's not Spider-Man crawling up the building, who is it??

The Trapster posing as Spider-Man? Holy moly, a second sign of improvement. Instead of their standard modus operandi (brainwash a good guy into helping them, or wait around the Baxter Building for the FF to come home and ambush them), the Frightful Four are actually trying a new strategy involving stealth and guile, rather than blunt force. And the Trapster has come up with a new, creative use for his paste. Geez, maybe these guys actually stand a chance this time.

Of course, they're still kind of stupid...

Ah, Wizard, on at least 5 previous occasions you've occupied the Baxter Building, the last two with the FF away and plenty of time to reconnoiter. If you don't have a schematic layout of the Baxter Building, it's your own damn fault...

Paste-Pot Pete's disguise actually fools the Torch...

...and allows him to sucker punch Johnny!!!

One down!!

Now, believe it or don't, it's time for the Trapster to take on the Thing!!



Unbelievable...half of the Fantastic Four taken down...by the Trapster! Who would've thought? (Also, who would have thought the Trapster could jump that high?)

Pete lets the rest of the group in, and their next target: Sue Richards. And we learn perhaps too much about the Richards' nocturnal activities.


Hey, a fairly creative way for Electro to use his powers!! My God, they're actually going to pull this off, aren't they? Reed is left on his own to face the four evil-doers, and he doesn't even know they're in his home!

After a couple of pages of dodging around, they actually use teamwork to put down Mister Fantastic:

Well, that's it. Game over. Finally, the Frightful Four have learned all the important lessons of villainy, and triumphed over their long-time nemeses.

Uh, no.

Because, for reasons completely unclear, they kept Spider-Man alive, and brought him along, trussed up in the Wizard's anti-gravity ship.

If you think about it, they didn't even need to go after Spider-Man in the first place. There's no reason they had to capture Spidey before they could have the Trapster impersonate him, is there? His actual presence wasn't necessary. They could have just skipped straight to step B.

OK, so maybe capturing Spider-Man was Electro's price for joining...and capturing Webhead ensured that he wouldn't just happen to swing by and ruin their plan.

By why not just kill him there? Or lock him up in your secret HQ, or a cave, if you want to save the torture/kill for later? Why in heaven's name do you bring him along, and leave him conscious and struggling to get out his bonds?!?!?!?

Because you know what's going to happen now:



And just like that, the Frightful Four's plans are flushed away. Spidey tricks Electro into taking down the Wizard:

He frees Reed, who quickly takes out the Sandman in a very familiar way:


Uh, Spidey, you really should recognize this--it's the exact same way you took down Sandy in his very first appearance:

Or are you just humoring Reed's sudden show of whimsy?

Electro then gets demoted back to the minor leagues in a humiliating way:


Did I say humiliating? Ben, Sue and Johnny have freed themselves, and the Trapster finds himself cornered. His way out?

Ay-yi-yi, the Trapster faints. FAINTS!! So soon after taking out two of the FF single-handedly, he reverts to Paste-Pot Pete in about the most humiliating manner possible.

Man o man, that's so sad. The Frightful Four finally change up their strategy, they use a real plan, they succeed...and it's all whizzed away in about 5 seconds as they revert to stupidity and cowardice. All because they brought Spider-Man along. That is sooo Frightful Four, the Official Super-Villain Team of the Facepalm.

It would be nine years--NINE YEARS--until they returned to menace the Fantastic Four. Don't fret, though...they'll turn up in less then a year, in a rather unexpected place...


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