There are two way to solve tricky cases.
The first way, you can put your nose to the grindstone, and do some actual detective work: sort through clues, analyze data, maybe do some undercover work, and generally use your brain to solve a difficult case.
The second way, you can cheat like hell, using your fantastic superpowers to bulldoze your way to a solution.
Guess which way Superman uses?
Crime boss "Big Jim Martin" cannot be put away, because they can never find any evidence against him. He never puts anything on paper, his subordinates do all the dirty work, and no one can figure out where he stashes his loot. (You'd think the fact that his lackeys get caught and roll on him as crime boss would be enough for a conviction...but this is Metropolis, and apparently prosecutors here can't convict a ham sandwich without Superman handing them everything on a silver platter...)
Superman investigates, but finds both his super-hearing and super-vision stymied!
I've never heard of using lead in sound-proofing...
So, how does Superman resolve this dilemma? Forensic accounting? Attempt to find evidence to corroborate the underlings' testimony? Check for fingerprints in areas where there might be secret passages? Nope...
"Borrowed," Superman?
Let's note...Superman built an entire new top floor onto the skyscraper, interior and exterior; made an exact duplicate of Big Jim's office, furniture and all; done all of the electrical and plumbing; extended the elevator shaft...all in one night and all with materials "borrowed" from a building to be torn down. Jeez Louise, Supes, if you're that good at jiffy construction, why don't you just rebuild every tenement in Suicide Slum?
Anyway, now Superman has tricked Big Jim into going into a non-lead-lined version of his office, so he can spy on him (without a warrant!) and figure out where the loot is hidden...
I think Mission: Impossible borrowed this plot at least 4 times during its run...Superman discovers Big Jim's hidden treasure trove.
Because, of course, instead of laundering the money or sending it to Swiss bank accounts, Metropolis crime bosses keep their loot laying around in big piles, including what looks like bags of coins!!
Then, of course, he immediately tears down his elaborate ruse, without any sign being left:
So, Superman solves the case...but it's so damn inelegant, isn't it? Solving a case by brute force instead of deductive reasoning. Yeah, it gets the job done...but you just know Batman wouldn't be overly impressed. He'd wonder why Superman went to all that work when he could have just solved the case by thinking harder.
Yeah, that's the difference between Superman and Batman...Batman is the chess grandmaster who deeply understands the game, while Kal-El is the super-computer that can win at chess, but only by brute force calculation of billions of moves per second. Effective, perhaps, but crude and inelegant...
Superman solves crime the hard way in World's Finest #39 (1949).
The first way, you can put your nose to the grindstone, and do some actual detective work: sort through clues, analyze data, maybe do some undercover work, and generally use your brain to solve a difficult case.
The second way, you can cheat like hell, using your fantastic superpowers to bulldoze your way to a solution.
Guess which way Superman uses?
Crime boss "Big Jim Martin" cannot be put away, because they can never find any evidence against him. He never puts anything on paper, his subordinates do all the dirty work, and no one can figure out where he stashes his loot. (You'd think the fact that his lackeys get caught and roll on him as crime boss would be enough for a conviction...but this is Metropolis, and apparently prosecutors here can't convict a ham sandwich without Superman handing them everything on a silver platter...)
Superman investigates, but finds both his super-hearing and super-vision stymied!
I've never heard of using lead in sound-proofing...So, how does Superman resolve this dilemma? Forensic accounting? Attempt to find evidence to corroborate the underlings' testimony? Check for fingerprints in areas where there might be secret passages? Nope...
"Borrowed," Superman?
Let's note...Superman built an entire new top floor onto the skyscraper, interior and exterior; made an exact duplicate of Big Jim's office, furniture and all; done all of the electrical and plumbing; extended the elevator shaft...all in one night and all with materials "borrowed" from a building to be torn down. Jeez Louise, Supes, if you're that good at jiffy construction, why don't you just rebuild every tenement in Suicide Slum?Anyway, now Superman has tricked Big Jim into going into a non-lead-lined version of his office, so he can spy on him (without a warrant!) and figure out where the loot is hidden...
I think Mission: Impossible borrowed this plot at least 4 times during its run...Superman discovers Big Jim's hidden treasure trove.
Because, of course, instead of laundering the money or sending it to Swiss bank accounts, Metropolis crime bosses keep their loot laying around in big piles, including what looks like bags of coins!!Then, of course, he immediately tears down his elaborate ruse, without any sign being left:
So, Superman solves the case...but it's so damn inelegant, isn't it? Solving a case by brute force instead of deductive reasoning. Yeah, it gets the job done...but you just know Batman wouldn't be overly impressed. He'd wonder why Superman went to all that work when he could have just solved the case by thinking harder.Yeah, that's the difference between Superman and Batman...Batman is the chess grandmaster who deeply understands the game, while Kal-El is the super-computer that can win at chess, but only by brute force calculation of billions of moves per second. Effective, perhaps, but crude and inelegant...
Superman solves crime the hard way in World's Finest #39 (1949).
Actually, it seems to me more that Superman here (metaphorically) played chess based on the model of Napoleon. Who was said to have cheated at the game, in particular by moving pieces when his opponent wasn't looking, sometimes even placing pieces he had lost back on the board!
ReplyDeleteMost definitely -- a detective, Superman is NOT. Good point!
ReplyDeleteThen again, Batman wasn't always that great a detective, either.
ReplyDeletehttp://fraziersbrain.blogspot.com/2009/09/out-of-vault-batman-246.html
Fair enough, Frazier...particularly since post-Frank Miller, Batman would be just as likely to hang a crook upside down off a building or beat the snot out of him, rather than do any actual detective work...
ReplyDelete