Monday, August 20, 2007

Kontinuity Kop--Whither Aquaman?

Update: Apologies to Brad Meltzer, as I misspelled his name throughout the original post. Me=dumb.
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Look, this one may very well may not be a continuity blunder...but then again, it may be. Either way, it's as annoying as hell.

If this keeps up, I'm goona need a frikkin' raiseLet's take a look at last week's JLA #12. We have two mysterious, shadowed beings secretly observing all the members of the Justice League and making pithy observations.

Aside. The top 2 marks of a Brad Meltzer comic: 1) Shadowy figures watching our heroes. SPOILER ALERT: the reveal is NEVER as good as the build-up. 2) Said shadowy figures comment on our heroes actions and motivations, thus confirming Meltzer's modus operandi of telling us everyone's characterization, rather than showing it.

Anyway, by the end, we get this panel:
Why do I feel like somebody's watching meeeeee

Now, before anyone quibbles, the guy on the right is referred to as "Arthur" by J'onn, who also identifies him as one of the JLA's founders. So it is Aquaman, and not the "new" Aquaman.

Aquaman, the original Orin/Arthur Curry, who had been transformed into the Dweller from the Depths, died in Aquaman #50. Died.

Granted, the story left open some possibility that Orin could maybe possibly somehow resurrect himself via magical means. So the fact that he turns up in JLA #12 is not, in and of itself, a continuity error. It does, however, mean that J'onn and Arthur are incredible dicks.

The JLA believe Arthur to be dead..they went to investigate his apparent demise. Think about this...these people are supposedly his friends, he's one of their founding members. And he doesn't bother to tell them he's alive. How would that make you feel, if you thought one of your buddies had kicked it, except he hadn't, and he neglected to tell you...and was all the while spying on you? And J'onn is helping him. Without some attempt at an explanation of why the charade is happening, the only conclusion is that J'onn and Orin are huge assholes.

And while were on the subject, remember how J'onn is so so careful not to read any one's minds without permission? Apparently, that respect for privacy ends when it comes to surreptitiously spying on your friends. Whether by hidden cameras or super-vision or some magic spell or whatever, this is somehow OK???

And of course, big raspberries go to DC editors and Meltzer. A character died? Who cares what another author intended? I'm bringing him back, no explanation, no concern as to how or why or continuity or anything. Outstandingly stupid, especially since Meltzer won't be around to clean up his mess. So now we have 2 Aquamen running around? How's that gonna work?

Oh, never mind. They'll just wipe out the new one in Final Crisis, anyway, just you wait. Until then, remember: in any DC title you read, any permanent character development can and will be completely ignored and over-written by another writer, with no attempt to have it make sense. Because DC continuity is just wiki-continuity, waiting for the next guy to change it at 2 am and not worry whether anyone notices, because nobody is minding the store.

4 comments:

  1. I have a hunch that Aquaman's inclusion there was most likely just Meltzer doing whatever he wanted to do regardless of continuity... the only continuity which matters to him at all is that from the 70s. Maybe he didn't know that the original Aquaman was dead, maybe he didn't care; regardless, that's the editor's goddamn job, to know such things and make sure stupid stuff like this doesn't happen.

    I didn't know the original Aquaman was now dead... but I'm not an editor at DC.

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  2. Ah, but DC has no real editors these days, it seems. Maybe they're afraid to offend "name" writers, so they let 'em get away with anything. Maybe under Didio, "continuity" is frowned upon as nitpicking. Maybe after so many cosmic reboots they think it just doesn't matter anymore.

    But whatever the reason, this kind of thing is going on every week at DC. Very frustrating to readers with attention spans.

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  3. Meltzer is the new Haney!

    Except I don't like his work.

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  4. Oops, I misspelled "Meltzer" as "Metzler" throughout the original post. All has been corrected.

    Soeaking of Haney, see tomorrow's post...

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